100 milestone celebration [lvl 3+] [edit]

You have been bumped!

Congrats on the milestone. )

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Congratulations! :)

Also, I've always loved this one.

As a Boy Scout, we would camp a lot and go on hikes.
One night, we had to do a night hike, alone, for a merit badge. I had left the campsite about an hour earlier and a terrible storm rolled in. The sky opened up and the ground was quickly saturated. I tried to continue my hike for another few minutes, but it got cold and I was chilled and soaked to the bone, so I decided to try to head back to camp.
Lightning was starting to crackle above me, so I thought I should try to take a shortcut to make my hike back quicker. I pulled out my compass and found my direction, but the rain made it impossible to see more than five feet in front of me.
I was looking down at my compass, not paying any attention to where I was going, and suddenly felt weightless. The feeling didn't last long as I thumped down on slippery earth a second later.
I had fallen onto a ledge on the side of a rather steep cliff, the bottom of which was at least fifty feet down.
I sat there, contemplating on how to get back up this cliff as water rolled over the edge ten feet above me. There was nothing to grab onto to pull myself up. I was stuck there.
After a few minutes, I noticed the little ledge I was standing on was slowly getting smaller. The water was coming down so hard it was eroding the tiny bit of safety I had.
I dug through my pockets, thinking maybe I had something, anything, to help me out of my precarious situation. All I had was my compass, a cough drop, and a match. I was screwed.
So, I sat there, watching the edge of the ledge I was on get closer and closer to my feet, when suddenly I felt something pushing on my back.
I turned slightly and saw a wooden box sticking out of the cliff behind me. It was working its way out of the side, the rain surely helping it along. I tried to move away from it, but the ledge wasn't very wide and the box kept coming out, pushing me farther to the weak and failing edge.
As more of the box came out, to my horror, I realized it was a coffin! I had no idea how old it was, but it looked rather rotten. All I could think of was being pushed off this ledge, and the rotten coffin breaking and dropping a skeleton onto my broken and battered body at the bottom.
The coffin crept closer, my foot began to slip. I grabbed onto a root that was sticking out of the cliffside and dug in my pocket once more.
I hurriedly tore the wrapper off the cough drop and stuck it in my mouth. It stopped the coffin.

If I tell a fart joke, will I be added to your Whitelist?;)

And bump...

Don't have joke, it's out of stock...
Have a bump instead ;)

congrats :3

poll: 100 dollars please ;_;

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A guy walks into a bar, orders 12 shots and starts drinking them as fast as he can.

The bartender asks, "Dang, why are you drinking so fast?"

The guy says, "You would be drinking fast, too, if you had what I had."

The bartender asks, "What do you have?"

The guy says, "75 cents."

❤

Bump!
Just got one joke.
"A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. So now you know why they call this a workstation."

Do you know why isnt BB hungry?

Cause BB-8... :D

Bump and happy easter!

Bump, I have no joke to tell at 8 am :/

congratz.. and hidden Bump

Easter? What if we don't celebrate easter? :(

Bump and meow.

Q: Why don't cats play poker in the jungle?
A: Too many cheetahs.

bump

bump!

What do scientists like to plant in their gardens?

A chemistry.

Congratulation on your milestone,CUPooUT.

'When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did – in his sleep. Not yelling and screaming like the passengers in his car.'

Bump

For all the batman joke lovers

What do you call it when Batman skips Church?
Christian Bale

bump!

Congratulations and thanks for the train. =)

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