2in1 - How do you want Valve to announce Half-Life 3/What is it going to be about?

So first thing's first... The announcement... I hope that Valve launches a nuclear missile strike on the moon, and when the moon explodes, it is left in the shape of the Half-Life 3 logo...

Do you think that they should do this, or should they just launch napalm on it so the fire looks like the logo, or should they do something more subtle like blackout most of the U.S. and what's left on looks like the logo?

Now for the story...

Me and my friend have been talking about this for a while and we have finally come to a conclusion of what Half-Life 3 will be about...

Left 4 Team Half Portal Strike of Defeat... L4D, TF2, HL, Portal, CS, and DoD, all in one...

It's going to start out with Chell and the companion cube walking around when Chell sees someone in the distance, she runs towards it thinking she finally found someone else on the planet... When she gets there, the person will turn around, only to reveal it's not a human, but a zombie, and there's a horde... And then, out of no where, gun shots come raining in and all eight people from both L4D games come running in to help... They start explaining the whole zombie concept, when one of them gets closer to the body of a zombie and notices it's different... It's got a headcrab on it... Then, they backtrack to a city and when they get there, there are people fighting, the CS people, and the Combine... Then, out of no where, a person in a red shirt jumps across the rooftops, and an army follows behind... TF2... So they all fight, take down the combine, and then that's where everything begins... Wait, where's Freeman? Well... He is going to mysteriously appear when they run out of ammo and you will hear whack whack whack, He comes in to save the day with his trusty crowbar...

But seriously though, we really think that it's going to be a cross between Portal and Half-Life just because of the Borealis (not sure if spelled right) thing and whatnot. But my friend put this together... Why is it the, "hand-held portal device?" You don't call a cup a hand-held mug, do you? I mean, they have hand-held devices like the PS Vita, PSP, NDS etc. etc. But those all have bigger version of them, PS3 and Wii... So why the hand-held portal device? There is something bigger... Perhaps that is what the Borealis is, is just a giant portal device that looks like a boat...

I'm sure a lot of what I have said is obvious, but hey, there are some people out there who have never heard of any of this so that's why I said it... That and people can prove me wrong and shtuff...

And hey, the good thing about this theory is they they don't have to learn how to count to 3, they can just call it Half-Portal (name WIP)...

TL;DR version:

Blow up moon to look like HL3 logo, All Valve games combined, Portal and Half-Life mix...