Thanks, rough times lately, but better overall the last few months. More energy I feel like. Hoping the antibiotics work out this round. I can't take them too long due to circumstances beyond my control, but glad I am getting another chance with this particular type. Crazy rash right when I started, but only two in the first 6 months or so. That's one thing that calmed down, whatever the cause. Both rashes were pretty light too, but I did have some weak times during them... Watching a friend's house for some extra income, which is nice of them to do. Hoping you're doing pretty okay yourself though!
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Sorry for the late reply, been recovering the last few days from a visit from my aunt and uncle, I've been absolutely wrecked since they were here.
Hopefully you find success with the antibiotics.
As for me, my health's fluctuating a lot, I'm not in anywhere near as much pain as I was a few weeks ago but my insomnia and energy levels have gotten worse.
Apart from that the only other thing of note that happened was a scare from my grandma the other week, she was in hospital and most of the family thought she was on the way out, but it luckily turned out to be a false alarm and she just needed her medication adjusted.
Mood wise I haven't been great lately due to my insomnia and the scare I just mentioned, but the visit from my aunt and uncle and just socialising has improved my mood a lot, although it came at the cost of a very large amount of energy and cognition.
So at the moment I'd say I'm good.
Hope you have a good week mate. :)
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I'm glad the scare turned out to be just a medication issue, and nothing more! I'm wondering if some of mine may be causing extra issues and side effects with some of my added fatigue levels... It would be worth working on adjusting some I think. No matter how bad things are on some days, I just try not to let my mind wander into places that are too dark, as that is tough to get out of when you are already physically suffering. Easier said than done, but staying positive and fighting on is crucial in keeping myself one step ahead of my illness.
I am not really one step ahead healthwise, but it's an area I won't let my illness touch if I can help it, since I do have some control over that part some of the time. Bad flares and stuff... I keep going back to thinking how much pain I am in, or how bad I feel, but I try to snap back out of it and change the negative thoughts... doesn't help - it's a good safety mechanism for the body though to alarm somebody that something is wrong though, so on that side of things, I can understand it too from a survival perspective.
I find a lot of conversation with friends and family to be draining if I am over-bombarded. Easy to happen for me, with my autism stuff. Best thing for me is a dark and sensory free, or low stimulation zone. Something like that... I can take a bit of time (or a day or two) to kind of let the sensory stuff depressurize a bit. Works nicely for me, and I'm glad I have that when I need it. Good for just physical recovery too... I try to be healthy, even though I am not. My mind still wants to do things at that level, and sometimes I end up doing a lot and feeling pretty awful, and other times, I am too cautious, and I think I could have done more... and then sometimes I feel okay after, but then maybe 2 days later, it hits me really hard. It's really unpredictable - can't ever truly figure it out on where my limit is, so I am generally pretty cautious unless it's a rare occasion, or something I really need to do.
My sleep's been off the last week or so due to heat intolerance - just could not sleep because I felt too warm recently at night... Strange I could not get cool at all. An internal kind of thing, since my skin felt fairly cool, but I was a bit sweaty also. My internal temp just gets crazy like feverish... but I never register a temperature. I haven't had a fever in probably 15 years or so, even though I've felt like I had hundreds over the course of that time. Pretty odd stuff. My sleep is really off though as well. Hoping to be back on track in a couple more days though. I am glad I don't have to hold a job and work around it. I kind of seem to have one thing or another that lightens or gets worse... and it's like a revolving door, but something is always bugging me. My head, or my back, or muscle tension somewhere... or a sort of rawness when the fibro-like stuff kicks in, or I'm having bad brain fog, or nausea, or IBS issues, or fatigue. Or the insomnia, or a terrible mood, or my seizure spells where my brain feels like it's either plugged into a wall outlet, or I am in a groggy sleep state the entire day(they are something similar to absence seizures, but I am not so sure... neurologist diagnosed as such though). Could go on and on with all these weird things with the body. It gets crazy when you have one or more major chronic conditions... the systemic nature of these diseases really starts to spread out and hit a lot of things all the time, seemingly. Can pick and choose, depending on the person though, I believe.
I'll stop blabbing, since I am just kind of going and going, but a pretty okay day today. Back and shoulders are a bit raw feeling, and I think it's causing me a bit of nausea from the way the pain is running (kind of has that "broken bone" kind of nausea feeling, if you have experienced that ever). Could just be my digestion though, since I have the IBS and the antibiotics can cause some stomach discomfort too... Probably more like a combination of all though... I don't think my IBS is really kicking in though, since my intestines aren't really gurgling badly, and I just feel a certain way when that is my main issue... Keeping pretty positive though. Not too bad overall, even though that does sound bad. The fluish feeling isn't really too strong today, and that's really one of the worst symptoms. Having some energy compared to normal low energy days is also nice. My energy isn't too sapped, but I did not have a good night's sleep (too warm again, and the AC where I was staying was too damn loud and woke me up as it changed speeds... I am okay if there is a sound that is kind of the same, but if it changes, it will wake me up. Super light sleeper, even on 4+ meds a day that cause drowsiness. :D
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Sorry again for the late reply, my cognition is playing up at the moment, been rereading this over and over again the past few days trying to get my brain to take it in. I think I've understood your comment properly this time though.
Based on what you've said we have a lot in common in terms of how we're coping and how our illnesses are manifesting. In terms of mood and to an extent sanity, I guess I've been rather lucky in that I've developed some philosophical views that seem to keep me in check when I'm low that stop me from getting too much lower.
Good luck with everything again, Hope you're having or had a good day. :)
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I hope work is going alright for you on the whole. It's rough for me not being able to, and wanting to have a bit more income, but when I did work a little, it was always rough doing so, and even though I really liked my job, it was pretty tough, and I always wanted breaks. I was already fairly sick at that time, but it was not as crushing as it is these days with my energy... Can't win either way though!
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Yes! I should catch on with checking my giveaways more often... I'm sure there are a few that are over, so I will do that once I go over and respond to each comment here. The least I can do for the polite people who take time to bump my thread here. Thanks a lot!
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No problem, but don't misunderstand me -- I wasn't trying to gently nudge you into updating more often, I just happened to catch sight of that notice this time around and was struck by the remarkable longevity of this thread. When you first created it, I remember commenting here and then naturally expecting it to fade away. Then I was surprised to see it still getting bumped back to the land of the living for longer than I expected, but still figured it would die down eventually -- now it's just one of those handful of perennial threads that are part of the fabric of this place, but still unusual since it's for something so specific, unlike the others.
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I am surprised it got so much respect myself. It's lumped with other very great PSA type threads for things that are really great for people to be mindful of... I guess it fits, but yeah, it surprises me too. A few people are really awesome and will regularly bump it, which is nice to see. It's really thanks to those people that I can owe the success to (at least its continuity of staying fairly successful and active). My friend I mention in the topic as well as the "Not Alone" threads kind of inspired it... Finally I decided to give it a go, and I'm glad to see it has worked out with some very nice donations to the cause, or shared ones with some of the other nice groups that should get more attention for the impact they could really have on lives.
I definitely understand though, and yeah... I got sidetracked and forgot to check the stuff that I had up. It's still usually moderately up to date. I get some nudges here and there from people mentioning one or more is out. Sometimes I've found some that are 4 weeks or more old though... hah! I should keep up with 'em a little more often though, since I place them in the main topic to begin with. It's mainly about the content of the topic, but it is good if some of the contributions get a few bumps in during the time they are up. I'll try to keep it going for a while, since I hope to stick around myself for some time. Anything could happen, but I'm doing what I can here within my means...
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Hah, it's afternoon here (at -5 zone), so after one appointment, I'm doing somewhat okay. Drank some kava (an island plant that has mind and muscle relaxing properties), and I'm... well... relaxing! Have a good one over there, and as always, thank you for the support here!
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I'm doing ok, just have some stress due to work. :/ But I should be able to relax on the weekend since i'm almost done with my current assignments.
Kitty is doing great, he's curled up on my chest right now and i'm afraid to move because I don't want to wake him up. :3
I've also bought the visual novel bundle and I'm really looking forward to reading Root Double when I have time.
What about you? Everything ok?
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With me, yeah. Sort of. A lot of the usual, with a small outside bit out (or further out) of my control. When I'm struggling it's not so bad, but this is really bugging me a lot. Somebody very close to me got some pretty bad news, so we are going to wait and see what we can do... We've both been dealing with lyme for years, so it's nothing compared to that long battle, as we have sort of joked in the past when comparing it to other problems that can take you out very fast. Still I am in shock right now... Maybe it'll sink in eventually, but I am trying not to get too sad about it for now. I guess it's healthy to be sad also... don't want to suppress it either
I know how that is being afraid to move with sleeping animals or people near you. Usually they'll fall right back asleep, but it's hard not to, especially since I am more of a careful type across the board with everything. I even sneak up on people regularly, since I have learned to walk very quietly over time... I close things very softly, and I'm just really meticulous in general with everything.
I want to get that bundle too! I have a lot of them already... still a few from my wishlist I wanted at some point. I will probably end up getting them though... Haven't read many VNs, but I like the ones I have read. Lots of details in some of them, and I always liked the "choose your own adventure" books when I was young. Some are kinda 1 track, but most do have depth in choices, even if just for some extra dialog. Just the "cheat sheet" for ACE Academy (last one I read through) was pretty big (close to 3mb .png file). Fairly thorough one though. They do take their time on a lot of them to really make for an enjoyable read/play though!
Thanks for asking though, and another bit of a blab from me. Hoping things will be really great for you over the weekend!
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I hope the bad news turns out to not be too bad! It's not good if you suppress emotions for too long, so don't be afraid to let the sadness out.
I usually try not to wake my cat my when he is sleeping next to me, but he has some sixth sense and is suddenly wide awake when i just think about moving. :D
I used to have a huge collection of Fighting Fantasy and Lone Wolf gamebooks when i was in high school. Too bad i lent them to people and they "forgot" to return them. :S VNs are pretty good are when you want a change of pace from regular gaming. I also like the huge range of genres they cover. ACE Academy looks pretty nice, can't believe it flew under my radar.
Thank you! :3
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Yeah, cats are really smart like that... They have historically already put humans under their control to do their bidding!
Kind of lyme-related, but there is actually a coinfection of lyme (can be contracted many ways, as can other coinfections) that tennis player Martina Navratilova had at some point, called toxoplasmosis, that makes mice think cats are their friends - the organisms want to be eaten to continue their lifecycle or something, so it takes the fear away... Why? Gross spoiler Toxoplasma can only reproduce inside a cat's gut.
Anyway, yeah, maybe some people have this, in a milder form (I'm sorta... okay, completely joking!). The true form can cause really dangerous symptoms, and a lot of problems in people. Another one from ticks that also comes from some cats is bartonella. My lyme doctor suspects I may have that one too... Since cats and mice get along so well, that's why these ticks might have some of the cat diseases in them. I guess cats can be pretty feral themselves and get bitten by a lot of ticks. It's generally from the mice I think though, where they get most of their coinfections and stuff like that, aside from the lyme. Don't want to get all gross, but I just figured I'd throw it out there. Anyone who has had these kinds of things will generally have psychotic symptoms though. I think a lot of the neurological disorders are related to parasites or germs and bacteria. They even tried using some antibiotics on people with bipolar disorder, and a few other ones, and have had positive results! That's pretty crazy to think about... Same with ALS, but the studies were too small, since they were studying it on a mycoplasma or lyme-related topic.
Yeah, the news is pretty bad. Life-threatening, but it could be worse. When I was around 17 or 18, my best friend died suddenly one night from a heart condition and a grand mal seizure, so anything could happen to anyone at any time. She has some years left to go, hopefully... and it's not 100% fatal. We will see with time how it goes next month on her doctor appointment. She's really gotten me a lot of help, and worked tirelessly to keep me in good condition and as good of health as possible. I feel kind of guilty I haven't been more supportive in the same way for her, but she would tell me not to worry, and that I've done plenty in my own way. I am my harshest critic, afterall.
Some cats and dogs do kinda know without hardly any movement, or none at all, when you want to move. It is kind of a strange thing, and I have seen it as well! Some... are... completely... obstinate. They just refuse to even budge! They're like rocks, or kids that flop on the ground when they really want something, and get dragged across a floor! :D That's funny to see, since I know I did that a few times when I was little, no doubt!
ACE Academy is a little pricey, I think, but on sale it makes for a good one! A lot of work was put into it, but unfortunately they had to do some silhouetting(sp?) of more characters than they wanted to at certain times, or throughout, just because they ran out of budget or something or other. It's got a large portion voice-acted, which is also a plus. The character storylines are really nice, and it's got a good bit of content! I went through I think... 2 and a half(or so?) times so far on there I think? Forgot now... Haven't gotten back to it in a while. I do wish there were achievements or cards, but it's not super important to me for a game to have either, since it has little to do with the actual content of the game itself. The voicing is pretty good though, for the most part. Pixelfade's next one, Crystalline, looks pretty good too, and has a demo out, if you are interested.
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Yes, the upside-down face
https://emojipedia.org/upside-down-face/
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My previous GA (Evoland 2) has ended, so here's a new one: https://www.steamgifts.com/giveaway/HT2Q4/chivalry-medieval-warfare
Hope you're doing ok :3
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Thanks! I appreciate the giveaway addition to the page here :D Well... I am doing okay. We got our money for the month, but now they want a ton of medical records from various specialists and whatnot... Some new thing they're doing in the state here. I guess they're wanting to make it even harder for disabled people to get general assistance, and get rid of it altogether if you're not working at all.
I hope they are ready to make copies of several hundred papers. They want it all from the last two years... They asked for it!
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Papers from two years ? Seriously, don't they have something more important to do ? It's becoming ridiculous at this point...
I don't know if it's any consolation, but at least you can still get your full benefits, even if it's harder they didn't dare to reduce them, did they ?
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Yes and no on cutting things. They automatically cut mine for food and general assistance here and added me to my girlfriend's case, since I was residing at the same residence. If I had lived somewhere else, I could have had my own case or something... :shrug: So, that took out a bit of money for assistance, as though we are married or something. Weird... There have been months where they cut us off that month, created problems of their own making, then didn't reinstate the previous month (or months) where they terminated us wrongfully. So in that regard, we've lost probably thousands of dollars over the course of the last few years due to being terminated even though we followed all the rules, turned in or did what was required, etc. They don't really care, generally. Yeah, this month they gave back the benefits. Last month, only I got mine, and I split that with my girlfriend, since hers were terminated. No extra money this month, even though it was money we should have gotten... It's pretty messed up there.
I think there is some really underhanded stuff going on, and somebody should definitely investigate that place. But yeah, at least we have a little bit this month. It is not much, and nobody could really live on it adequately, but it's more than I would have otherwise. Tough having to rely on others, but at least I have a few people who are still helping me, and can understand I have disabilities that don't really allow me to be a reliable worker. I could probably do some things, but it really kills what little energy I have. I need to rest a lot too, and going anywhere to work would not really be able to accommodate for that. Home stuff with my own hours could work, but I'd probably not get enough hours in for it to be worthwhile, and even that takes it out of me... I'm focused on my health right now though, so if I can improve some stuff, maybe it can change in the future. I'm in need of a lot of medical too, so if I worked, I couldn't collect the medicaid insurance here, or I'd have to pay so much, it would be a much higher amount than what I'd make working anyway, if there was something I could do for limited hours. They will take benefits away if I try to better myself by working.... lol.
No incentive to even attempt it, unfortunately - if things improved. Unless I could keep my current medical, I would probably go broke from the costs of all the things I have to do all the time since I have so many different problems I have to go to doctors for regularly. I got a receipt from my pharmacy for a doctor from a year and a half period, and it was around $90,000 worth of medications during that time alone. With insurances, it would be lower, but still... with testing, and the costs of copays on meds and doctors, and then possibly monthly charges, it would get extremely expensive unless I was making a decent amount of money over time, and then there is the - if they do not cover certain things I need to have done. On the other side, if they covered a lot more, and I could see doctors closer, and had more options, it might be good switching if I had another source of income.
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My old giveaway Robot Roller-Derby Disco Dodgeball has ended. :) I saw above that you're doing okay and that's really good to hear :3 It's also pretty nice to be able to get a slight bit of revenge by making them make copies of a lot of papers. Heehee~
New gib:
[Overgrowth + Secret Preorder Forum access link (Level 2+)](https://www.sgtools.info/giveaways/412ecf0e-4d37-11e7-91df-fa163ee2f826)
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Thank you! I will add it in a moment here! Hopefully this paper thing will end it for a little bit. Been fighting with random stuff they keep coming up with since January. Have to go up there for this little new problem and that new problem. Each time, we ask, "Is there anything else we need to do?", and they say no. A week later, a new piece of mail comes in (at least they are dated before the expiration date at the office these days.. though they cut it close sometimes so you only have 2 or 3 days to do everything, or go in).
Every 6 months is a redetermination, and we had one in March or April I think, but I don't even know anymore, since we have to go back so often. If they take money for the month, and are slow and don't do anything, even after all the requirements are met by us swiftly, they almost never give us back the previous month that we are owed. It's a big giant scam or there's something unscrupulous going on there. They have made so many mistakes, and nobody gets fired. In a regular job, it wouldn't last more than a few months with the services offered. There is simply no competition, since it's run by the state here. Monopoly, and nobody monitoring what they are doing directly. There needs to be some kind of group above them that is not affiliated that will make sure they follow the rules, since they make everyone going in there follow strict rules and timelines. It's really hypocritical....
I think maybe they get paid more if they don't pay out as much. My theory: State still thinks a lot of people need help, since they have cases open, so they pay for those cases, even if they do not get any assistance that month... So, by not helping some get off of the system in place, they can request more funds, yet they are really not helping a lot of those people, running them in circles, terminating their funds and such, for no reason or fault of their own. It seems that way to me, at least. I guess the state gives out the moneys, but they don't really care where that money is going, or how efficient their programs are running. I could come up with a plan overnight that would make this one office ten times more effective at doing what it is doing, and an oversight committee would be way cheaper to the state, I would think, than all the people who could be getting off the system, but are not allowed to advance because of the way they are treated. A lot of wasted time is used scrutinizing everyone in there, treating them as being guilty before proven innocent. All those funds and wasted time on people like myself, where I signed a piece of paper saying I would report to them in the event of any changes within 10 days could be used actually checking out those that are suspect instead, and actually busting those really small amounts that could be trying to cheat the system for the small amounts they would get (probably less per month than those people working there make in a day). So, I didn't report to them any changes, so why do I keep getting letters saying, "prove this and prove that, and this isn't good enough now, even though it was before" kind of crap... I am not hiding anything, and I already signed a document stating I would report it. I am innocent, so why do they treat me as though I have done wrong, or am trying to hide and do wrong? Why do they target people like myself? It's really really odd... Especially given the fact that I have so much medical evidence in support of my disabled status. They're just looking for anything to knock people off... It's discrimination in my own case I think... That's why there are so many problems here, to point out just one piece of a big list of problematic things going on in a lot of areas in the US with poverty, disability, etc.
Disabled people (especially mental and those with problems that cannot be seen with the eye) are treated as though they are not sick. We are all liars and cheats, apparently. I wonder if they'd do this if I were missing a leg, for instance? I could go on and on about it, but it is what it is. Sorry about the long text, but it makes me a bit livid over what is going on. Still I think the antibiotics are giving me more energy. Pain herbals I take make me a little tired sometimes, and it is hard not to take them with the pain issues. Being on them longer makes it more difficult if I want to stop, since there is a dependency aspect as well... Four meds that "May cause drowsiness", "Use caution when operating heavy machinery..." etc. I take at least four types daily, along with a few for other probs as needed... That probably factors in too, and I might try to back off a few over time and see how I feel, and if the tradeoff makes sense. Eh, we'll see. I hope things can improve in those areas though.
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That's terrible :( I think if you can raise awareness for this in your community (or even globally through online petitions e.g. change.org, Avaaz) and convince your city/state representatives to do something about it? If can you tell them with confidence that it'll save them money, they'll probably do it.
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Yeah, maybe so... I have tried with other things like the mental health services here that I had abusive situations with (of course nothing else is really covered with this insurance), and the representatives just told me to file a complaint. Always somebody else's problem to deal with... I emailed some people, and they wanted me to call them and talk more about it, but I already left all the details in the email, so I didn't feel like going further. I am too busy with doctors, and fighting the exact things I mentioned above, and beyond, so it isn't something I could do at that time, or manage right now too well. I will need to think more about it if I want to proceed with something on the internet. Eventually if I get pushed too far, or have more time where I feel well enough, maybe I can try to get something in order though. More people should know what is happening, if in fact it's happening to a lot of people around here. I do think it would save some money though, if something like that is actually going on. I don't know for sure.
I also think there is a big problem with not enough doctors taking the insurance for poor people. I thought that is why doctors wanted to get into that kind of work, but on the other side of things, if they are not just being selfish or greedy, there is a lot more government and insurance interference with how doctors can treat... what insurance covers and pays for determines what the doctors can do for the patient. It isn't just medicaid here, but the other private insurances have the same kinds of problems depending on which insurance it is. While I think some are practicing because of greed, or because they "don't have enough time" these days to deal with the extra work, or whatever other excuse, when there are so many hundreds of medical practices all over the place, on every street practically, and barely anyone takes insurance given to poor people, that is definitely an issue. Something doesn't add up. The few specialists that take it, if there are few, usually have long waits in the offices, long wait times to get an appointment, and are overbooked constantly. I think if all doctors either were required to take a small amount of these patients, if there were any in their areas, or they gave out incentives to do so, it would really make finding doctors close by easier, and take some of the burden off of the ones that are taking all types of insurance and not discriminating against people in poverty. You walk into an office where there is maybe 2 or 3 people waiting, and they say they don't take the insurance. It is incredible. Shouldn't have to make 2 or 3 hour round trips just to see a doctor when there are hundreds of local doctors that will not take my insurance. Mitigating and dispersing patients in need to all doctors that practice medicine would solve much of this issue, or make it at least a little less of a problem. A doctor can still discriminate how they want to treat your situation based on your insurance type though... it will be in your chart.
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... I'll never give up.. but... I'm sorry. T.T ...
I am no longer going to keep this PSA going. It violates steamgifts terms which state:
"When posting links or content, that content should not force users, encourage users through reward, or primarily exist as a traffic source for users to perform an action for promotional, commercial, or monetary benefit. Such actions include but are not limited to clicking a referral link, liking a Facebook page, following a Twitter account, joining a Steam group, completing a survey, or making a donation."
Currently, everything on steamgifts, including entering a giveaway, breaks this rule. Nobody would enter if it did not encourage users through reward. It's not guaranteed, but neither are any other types of things being flagged as "bad" vs "good".
If anybody wants to continue this thread/post, I will be more than happy to allow such a thing.
I will win. But. I can't do this... not right now. Please keep it alive in your hearts and minds - and spread awareness to others!
We are saving lives. This isn't a joke, or something fun. It's real. The horrors of lyme are real.
Never... never... never ever knew... this could happen to me or anybody else for that matter. Please. Be grateful for your own health.
Live your life strong... and do things I cannot do. Please live life for me - where I couldn't be strong enough... you can! You will succeed! Be that person I wanted to be. The person I would have been, had I not gotten sick... as one of the healthiest people around before a damn tick destroyed me... at least up to now. One moment in time. It destroyed it all...
Please never forget your health... and how important it is. We only have one life. Don't waste your chances!
Please send me a message through steam if you wish to keep this going!
A friend of mine, JerichoOfRivia mentioned a while back that I should create a post about this on Steamgifts. I sort of considered, but I didn't know if I wanted to go through with the effort. I've decided to incorporate lots of giveaways into this and try to keep it bumped here and there when I can, and I hope some people will consider doing the same. It's a rather touchy and important issue, and I didn't know really how much I wanted to go into it, or what I would say. Here's what sprung from my mind, so I hope it will get my main point across without being too much about me, but it will be mainly about me, since I am one of many suffering from this disease with no cure.
Some of you already know this, since I mention it in comments here and there, but I have lyme. I was bitten by many many ticks when I was 11 and 12 years old, during the time of some experimentation being done on mycoplasma germs about 30 miles away. I also coincidentally happen to have a very debilitating form of mycoplasma. I told doctors I was sick for many years after my body started to tell me it wasn't well, but they did not believe me. I got progressively worse as time went on, starting with neurological symptoms, progressing to nerve sensations and pain, and then overwhelming fatigue. I was told it was in my head, or that it was all due to depression. Some doctors told me I had growing pains when I was still fairly young, and others blamed it on lack of exercise. Why would they even say that, when the whole reason I was complaining is because I could not do the things I used to do?
I used to run close to five minute miles, but now I'm lucky if I can even make it upright for five minutes on my really bad and fatiguing days. Running and doing other active things outside was sort of my downfall. If I had stayed inside leading an inactive lifestyle, I wouldn't have had nearly as many chances to get bitten by ticks. I started to lose faith and trust in all doctors, since they kept ignoring me when I told them I was sick, and as all the medical professionals I saw gaslighted me into that belief, I eventually believed I was imagining it all, that it really was in my head, so I gave up for a long time. Certain things helped me over the years, and other things seemed to help, but also caused me other problems. I am surprised I lived through this, and that I continue to be as strong as I am. I might just be lucky, since it hasn't yet attacked the places where it can with others, causing death within months to a few years.
I have over twenty various conditions, most chronic and some fully systemic. Some I can slow progression by taking supplements and other things, and most have no permanent cures. Some will take constant medication, and some can be prevented to a degree, or at least masked to some extent. There have been times where I've taken over 60 pills a day. On average I'm probably about half that right now. It's very hard to live like this, and when I was healthy, I never imagined a person could feel this way, even on my worst days, or in my worst nightmares.
When somebody asks me what it is like, I explain that it is like a constant flu most of the time, but instead of being able to sleep through it as a sick person would, and having it go away in a few days, it never ends. On top of that, I have to perform and function in life while I have the flu, unlike the people that get a lot of rest. They get better. I cannot rest twenty-four hours a day, and it's pointless to do that, since my muscles would only atrophy, and it's too painful to sleep for very long periods most of the time anyway. I have a lot more symptoms constantly barraging me aside from a simple flu, but I describe it this way, since most people know what the flu is like. The other stuff is a bit more difficult to get into with somebody healthy.
I have learned a lot about living on the other side of healthy that I would never have known, had I been treated properly. I think this disease and many others it causes are ignored so much because of the fact that nobody believes you are so sick, and most minds cannot comprehend something so devastating without actually having experienced such a thing, so they have a natural form of denial about it. Many people with lyme can do things at times, so on the outside they look fine for short periods of time. Other times when nobody sees them, it may be a different story. Many times the recovery period for doing the seemingly slightest things can be quite harsh. Other times I do a lot more, and it doesn't hurt me later. Most of the time I don't notice the hurt, because I already am hurting worse all over. It's not something somebody can ever see, like a missing arm or leg, for instance. The neurological effects are the same. Mental health is a sad thing to examine in today's world. I have test results of some things showing problems, like seizure disorders, but not very much evidence, since the brain is so complex. Most tech is very new, and hard to get to without large amounts of money. I found a place to work on some of my neurological things, perhaps, but it's over two hours away. My insurance is ignored by most doctors in the area that could help because I am on government assistance since I can't work. It is a form of discrimination that is ignored by my government.
I have only some tests that can show much of anything. Lyme tests are not very accurate. Probably well over half the tests give false negatives. Some people have gotten 10+ tests showing they have zero lyme, and they "suddenly" end up with a positive one. Also, many people do not get the "bullseye rashes", possibly as low as ten to twenty percent. I never got one that I noticed, but after many tick bites, my body started acting crazy, and I had three breakouts of strep in a single month, with full body rashes at 11 or 12 years old. I have gotten 3 or 4 lyme tests so far that are equivocal, and as close as you can be without an actually considered a positive result. I am probably too far into late stage lyme to get a pure positive result, since my antibodies are too busy to show up anymore on a high level, and the lyme learns to outsmart these tests over time, as has been proven in multiple studies and scientific tests, but I am being treated based on symptoms, and my close tests together.
I am one of many that gets toyed with by medicine on an unending quest to find out the truth. Doctors seem like they are useless many times, and will not help. It's really sad when people with that much power choose to not help you, and let you suffer. Some people can get away with almost anything though, and this is especially true of people with power over whether somebody lives or dies. In many cases, if they'd just drop the all-knowing ego a bit, listen to their patient, get into action, dig a little, offer choices, and maybe believe their patients, then a difference could be made for some of these people who are sick. I was not making doctor's appointments to have a fun time, and I don't think it should be put off so lightly.
People are probably sick if they have to call a doctor. Even in the rarest of incidents where they really are hypochondriacs, this is also a sickness that needs to be examined and treated if there really isn't anything wrong. Something in fact is wrong on some core level if they are looking for medicine to help them in some way. It's a cry for help no matter how you look at it. There is no reason to completely ignore human beings who are asking for help. That's what they are supposed to be there for. I guess some forget that along the way, or something. I don't really understand the lack of compassion for others. Some responsibility and accountability would be nice from people in these powerful positions. It's on them and their conscience though. I'm glad it's not me.
I consider myself and my situation a test for others. Will they do the right thing when they have a chance to offer me something, as a sick person? Will they ignore me, when they have a chance to be there for somebody in need? What would the spiritual people of the world do in these situations? Other creatures in the world, and other tribal settings accounted for the sick, and the rest of the group would look out for them and try to make them well.
I don't think the government wants me well here, to be honest. I make them far more money being sick and on the system, as a cash cow for Big Pharma, and whoever else is profiting. It is a win win for them if I struggle, because I have to either pay up, or I die. If I got better, I'd be a direct threat to their jobs, and that's dangerous when it's somebody who has been through hell already. We lose the apprehensions that healthier people tend to have, and we know what it's like to have nothing. Many times those kinds of people take less for granted, and can do a better job, since they don't want to go back to the way it was, being miserable and having next to nothing.
I know this is getting to be a long-winded post, but I want to raise awareness about third stage lyme, and that it can indeed become chronic and wreak havoc on your entire body. I think most if not all of my current conditions probably came from lyme, and I don't want other people to end up like me. There is very little I could think of that would be worse than living a lifetime with the pain, tiredness, torment, and expenses of dealing with problems like this. I cannot work because I am too sick, but I need to get better in order to work again, and so that's where the bulk of expenses comes from. It's a catch 22.
I'm also including all the years I could have had an income, and I did not. In society, they want you to work, but if you're too sick to work, then you must get better, but if you cannot pay for treatment, then you remain sick, unable to work. It is a vicious cycle, and yet another facet of medicine I will not get into. There are even organizations like IDSA, that say chronic lyme does not exist, and people in the medical profession think highly of this organization, and they believe this garbage. It's maddening that so many people are overlooked, and considered hypochondriacs, or mental, depressed, or whatever they want to mis-label so many people that are suffering.
Enough about me. Please remember a couple of things:
Also just a disclaimer of sorts that I am no expert on removing ticks!
The information is what I've come to believe in my own experience based on the sources I read and trust most. There isn't a lot to go on with ticks/lyme.
There is a lot of bad information out there about how to remove ticks. One way that most people have access to is a pair of tweezers close to the skin, and a steady pull directly away from your body, without crushing, jerking or twisting, is best . If it's too fast or hard, you can leave the mouth parts embedded under the skin. A distressed tick can also regurgitate a lot of dangerous disease-causing germs into you if you try to use other methods to remove them, like suffocation or burning.
If you, a pet, or somebody you know gets tick bites, try to get treated with antibiotics as soon as you can. Push for at least 4 weeks, if possible as well. If your doctor will not get you at least 4 weeks of some doxycycline antibiotic by choice, find another doctor. I guess different areas have rules. I would check the rules for my area, and get the largest amount of treatment I could as early as possible. This can ruin your entire life. Not something to take lightly.
It's one of the most underfunded medical problems in my country, yet as many as 300,000 new cases spring up each year.
A quote from lymediseasechallenge.org says, "Although the number of new Lyme cases annually is staggering, there is relatively very meager support for research funding. Indeed, although the annual incidence of Lyme Disease is higher than that of breast cancer, hepatitis, colon cancer, Multiple Sclerosis, HIV/AIDS and West Nile virus in the United States, unfortunately federal funding of Lyme Disease has been extremely disproportionate. For example, Lyme Disease occurs 6 times more often annually than HIV/AIDS, yet it receives less than 1% of the funding from the National Institutes of Health compared to HIV/AIDS. Likewise, there are 141 times as many cases of Lyme Disease than West Nile virus, yet Lyme Disease receives less than half of the funding for research."
There is a lot of good information out there, and a lot of misinformation as well. There are organizations like ILADS, that I think come closer to the truth about lyme disease.
Please consider adding Lyme Disease Association to your charity list if you use HumbleBundle, Amazon (AmazonSmile), or other places you may have an option to donate to for charitable causes, if you don't really have a particular charity you are set on using. About 96% of all money that is donated here goes to causes that help spread more information and education on lyme, as well as other important missions, including finding lyme doctors for people, since a lot of lyme doctors try to stay under the radar in fear of being prosecuted for helping people with lyme. Hopefully it's okay for me to mention that, but if not I'm okay removing the organization.
Unfortunately, according to many states here, and their rules, things like Lyme shouldn't be treated with long-term antibiotics, but having acne is a different story, and long-term treatment of acne with antibiotics is okay. Doctors in many states trying to give antibiotics long-term for lyme have had their licenses revoked, and some have been jailed. It's very bad in some other countries as well, such as Australia. Just an example here, but there's something deeply corruptive at work here in the USA with double standards like the mentioned one above. Lyme can and will kill, while acne is more cosmetic. Anyway, the above mentioned charity is located in the town where my lyme doctor practices too, Jackson, New Jersey.
I found out I had lyme disease after living with my problems for over twenty years. I now have a real diagnosis. I feel liberated.
Please bump for:
The generosity of myself and others, and awareness of lyme!
Good karma!
Your own conscience, health and well-being!
To make me happy to add current giveaways!
To increase the likelihood of me adding even more giveaways at a more frequent pace!
High non-bundle giveaway chances in the future if it can get enough activity! So far not so good on the bump % - still dropping one or two non-bundles every now and then... but the % of joins vs. bumps just ain't up to snuff. Sorry, but it's kinda expensive, so just a small effort would be appreciated if you take the time to join something. Rude otherwise, IMO.
If you're feeling generous and would like to make a giveaway, this format below is awesomely appreciated!
[Superfabs Is the BEST EVER! - Level x+](http://www.steamgifts.com/giveaway/MaR10/MUSHROOMS) | your contributor name
GIVEAWAYS: (I will update this regularly, if I can, but I mainly wanted to express awareness unless something catches on).
*Let me know if you notice something that's already expired, and I'll remove, since I may not notice right away!
Thanks to D3D for this one!
Abalone (ends 1/1)
Thanks to Corran for these!
Beholder - Level 3
[Sniper Elite V2 - Level 3]](https://www.steamgifts.com/giveaway/36k15/)
Resident Evil Revelations - Level 3
Thanks to dubnio for these!
RUNNING WITH RIFLES - Level 4+
Seasons after Fall - Level 4+
Jalopy - Level 4+
Super Mega Baseball: Extra Innings - Level 4+
Jet Racing Extreme - Level 4+
SAMOLIOTIK - Level 4+
Loot Hero DX - Level 4+
Tap Heroes - Level 4+
No Turning Back: The Pixel Art Action-Adventure Roguelike - Level 4+
Lead and Gold - Gangs of the Wild West - Level 4+
Gunspell: Steam Edition - Level 4+
Thanks to insideone for these!
Scrollonoid - Level 3+ | insideone
HEXOPODS - Level 3+ | insideone
Dead Dust - Level 3+ | insideone
Purgatory II - Level 3+ | insideone
Lantern of Worlds - Level 3+ | insideone
Super Blasting Boy - Level 3+ | insideone
Thanks to Kyrrelin for this one!
Punch Club
Thanks to Vee79 for this one!
Galactic Fighters - Level 1+
Thanks to Zorskan for these!
Rise & Shine
Pinstripe
Thanks for all of the support!
LET'S KEEP THE AWARENESS ALIVE!! THAT'S WHAT THIS IS ALL ABOUT! PLEASE COME BACK TO BUMP HERE AND THERE
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