Humble Bundle V (over)

Game was hidden in the area I've just bolded. The thread was just something long to cover up the link and I decided a parody of the massive bitching that happens every time a new bundle comes out was in order. Some of you realised the thread for what it was, some of you realised it was also a giveaway thread, and some of you helped so very much in giving me a laugh about how pathetic they were being in this thread. Thank you all.

It sucked. I don't think I've ever seen a worse bundle. Full of games everyone's already got on sale because nobody wanted to pay full price for them.

Braid? You've got to be kidding me. Some crappy platformer where you can reverse time to stop yourself screwing up. What, did the devs never think of savepoints and reloading? And the story, no-one can figure that shit out. What, it's some metaphor for the atom bomb or young love or something? Jeez, who made this crap, I hope he goes broke.

Limbo? Black and white! Who the fuck makes a game in black and white?! Shitty college art students out of ideas for "cerebral" projects and time travellers from 1920, that's who. Don't even get me started on Limbo.

Super Meat Boy? A super-hard platformer by a dev who gave up trying to make a playable one. Fuck, it may still not be playable after their "We know everything about how to keep our network secure" snafu. Requires pixel perfect precision and the developers don't care if they misplaced something. Those guys are dicks.

Sword and Sworcery? Hell, I don't even fucking know what that shit is. Some... thing. The devs are fucking dyslexic though, so they just decided to change the title after they fucked it up.

Bastion, can you guys shut up about it? It's some crappy isometric platformer where the load distance for the fucking land is four feet in front of you. Style, you say? Shitty coding, I say. And you've got some slack jawed idiot talking at you for the entire game when you're trying to play. It's like playing a game with a redneck in the room, only you can shoot the redneck when he gets too annoying.

Lone Survivor's just some stupid 8-bit pixel art project made by someone who doesn't have any better skills. Even then, you look like you've got some retarded grin on your face the entire game rather than a surgical mask. It's like the Joker took a break from intelligent crime and decided to pretend to play zombies in his apartment block. Oh, and your flashlight's powered by a fucking lemon, because a potato would last longer than it does.

Amnesia? God, what the fuck. Some pathetic version of Silent Hill, trying nothing but jump scares. You don't even have a fucking gun, what's up with that shit? You just run and run, like some little wimp who gets blurry eyes from crying whenever you leave him alone too long in his own shadow.

Psychonauts? Thank fuck no-one's ever going to make a sequel. Never played a worse game in my life. Ooh, but it's revolutionary. No, it isn't. It's Inception: The Shitty Platformer: Crap Collection Quest Edition. Tim Schafer should go back to doing what he did best, scrubbing toilets, because he can't design a game worth a crap.

Oh, and you get the soundtracks for half this shit. Even the music sucks. Everything about this bundle is the worst bundle I've ever seen.