In memory of Stas, may he -FIND SOME BETTER WORD TO BE INSERTED IN THIS SECTION- in peace. Peace and love guys, peace and love.

I once knew of a man who liked to lick his shoes. But this wasn't just some lick like the ones your dog gives you. No, it was a lick like a cat bored with nothing left to do. It was excessive, he made sure to lick every part he could. The laces, the heel, the sole, and the interior as well. He did this day after day in the subway, even when there was some questionable amount of brown stuck to it. But this man is to be admired, and I simply tell you why. He knows what he does, he's not crazy, he's efficient. So I encourage all of you, find any object you'd clean in a different matter, and lick it. Lick your plate clean, lick your screen of all those spots, lick car clean, lick your razor blade instead of-- actually, don't lick a razor blade. BUT LICK! Lick to your hearts content! And soon, soon, you'll find that you've gotten enough diseases to fill a novel.

This message has been brought to you by Bullshit Industries. You supply the demand, we'll shovel the shit.

Good night everybody!