can a male giraffe reach his own dick with his mouth?

11 years ago*

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I think so, I mean, the neck is pretty long... but we'd have to consider the bone density of the neck, and whether or not it is flexible. We could probably make a formula for the curve that a giraffe's neck makes when it moves, and whether or not that curve would intersect with it's dick...

11 years ago
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yeah thats what i was thinking about

11 years ago
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You should totally send this to mythbusters!

11 years ago
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actually that doesnt sound like a bad idea

11 years ago
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It's possible.

11 years ago
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We should plot this down on a graph, and see if X and Y would intercept

11 years ago
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why... why would this come to your mind?...

11 years ago
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......it just popped in my brain.....

11 years ago
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While doing what exactly :P

11 years ago
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eh going nothing special :3

11 years ago
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I'd imagine they could, judging by their skeletons. In practice, I don't know.

e: giraffes are into same-sex fucking though.

11 years ago
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well its hard to judge what down their form that elevation

11 years ago
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The extra-long neck is to stop that happening. Evolution.

11 years ago
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I don't think so. But these guys can.

11 years ago
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Walruses (walri?) have huge dicks.

11 years ago
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2nd largest in the animal kingdom

11 years ago
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im the first one :3

11 years ago
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i dont think so; the neck cant bend like that

11 years ago
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If the giraffe believes, it will be able to.

11 years ago
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Are you preparing an answer in case anybody asks you what kind of animal you wish you could be?

11 years ago
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that would be a cat mister :3

11 years ago
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I know they can.

11 years ago
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As someone who is unashamed of having weird searches in their autocomplete history, google tells me this was asked three years ago on Yahoo Answers

My own bet would be no...But imagine what would be going through the giraffe's mind if it could!? ...Probably jizz...

11 years ago
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yeah i actually saw that one but then i saw the answer that said that every animal can reach its own penis so im not sure

11 years ago
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Sadly, not every animal can. Want proof? Give it a go...

Not every creature has to nosh itself off to keep its junk clean. ...Sadly...

11 years ago
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i feel bad for those poor animals that cant ;-;

11 years ago
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Don't be. In most circumstances their lives are significantly simpler and easier than ours. Where they are not, the animals seem to show little capability to consciously recognise the difficulty of their lives. So they're cool with it.

Where these creatures are consciously aware of their inability to fellate themselves (waves as a member of the Homo sapiens), we have developed a system of sexual strategy that involves us pairing up with a partner willing to perform those tasks for us - usually in exchange for similar treatment and the potential of offspring.

Essentially I'd rather spill it in her mouth than my own.

Also, did start thinking this thread may need an [NSFW] but that implies it's safe anywhere else...which it isn't.

Edit: So much spelling fail! I need sleepz!

11 years ago
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in simple words ignorance is bless :3

11 years ago
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Ignorance is bliss, or blowjobs are better. One of the two.

11 years ago
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debatable :3

11 years ago
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Essentially it should not be anyone's mouth you squirt your semen in.

11 years ago
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thats the best part :3

11 years ago
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Thanks for Aliens CM

11 years ago
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I used to be a giraffe so trust me a giraffe can do it but it opens a portal to another dimension where dick sucks you and giraffe are in a war with the might gorilla name " Bunka bon Kuska " and he is mad because he can't suck his dick and no one else will because it's a micro - penis and Bunka bon Kuska's goal is to kill all giraffe because they can suck there own dick....... which is why you don't see giraffe do it anymore.

11 years ago
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"Another dimension where dick sucks you..."

Soviet Russia?

11 years ago
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Deleted

This comment was deleted 3 years ago.

11 years ago
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i dont know im looking at the pic of a giraffe's skeleton right now and it look decently flexible

11 years ago
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A little off topic but a friend at work was wondering today if Shrek had a big dick...

11 years ago
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well he had kids in the third movie

11 years ago
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11 years ago
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Well Played.

11 years ago
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11 years ago
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Why are we even discussing the weird sexual maybes when 'traumatic insemination' actually exists!

Want a brief; imagine if you (presumed male) and your partner (presumed female) wanted to get it on. But she had no hole, your dick was a spike and you had a vague idea where you had to shoot your load...Stabby stabby!

And some people believe in creationism...WHAT GOD WOULD DO THIS!?

11 years ago
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people like talking about sex :3

11 years ago
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Then let's talk about shark sex!

You know how shark skin is rough one way and smooth another. It is made of small scales made of dentine (the same stuff that makes teeth) called denticles. In many species the male shark is so rough with the female during mating that the females have evolved thicker, stronger denticles around their neck where males like to hold on.

Might seem innocent enough but natural selection has been at play here! Meaning, at one point, many female sharks DIED by being banged so rough their necks were chewed out - thus being unable to reproduce!

That's why humans evolved the safe word...

11 years ago
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ohh so thats why they have white tummys, also im pretty sure sharks are not the only one that die in the "act of love" i think some dogs might die like that

11 years ago
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Praying mantis eats its partner after mating.

11 years ago
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yeah i think everybody knos that one but i think female spiders eat their whole mate

11 years ago
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Quite a few species across the spectrum of life get a bit rough. But the fact that sharks have had to evolve a countermeasure!? That's pretty amazing! Cats have rough sex but female cats don't have tougher skin on the nape of their neck! For that to have evolved in sharks, female mortality due to rough sex must have been disproportionately high enough to favour those with thicker skin! It's incredible!

Even more amazing for sexual behaviours...Bdelloid rotifers. Because they haven't had sex for MILLIONS of years. Pretty much the only known species to have made parthenogenesis a stable method of reproduction. Most other species use it only in emergencies, or go extinct. Somehow they have not only managed without sexual reproduction, but have speciated quite well without sexual reproduction! It's amazing.

Sorry...I may be having a bioscience nerdgasm here.

11 years ago
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wait a minute....i just realized some female humans also die for rough sex...

11 years ago
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Isn't that called parthenogenesis and isn't it where humanity is heading?

11 years ago
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I don't know about sharks specifically but other fish species just unload it in the vast ocean and hope for the best. There is no actual banging going on.

11 years ago
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uhhh i know dolphins arent fishes but they look like sharks does that count?

11 years ago
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Not really. Also sharks presumably never stop swimming. There are even debates whether or not they sleep.

11 years ago
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thats a debate? i tough it was stated that all fishes never sleep

11 years ago
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the definition of 'sleep' differs greatly among most organisms. It's believed most do 'sleep' in a way.

Also, not all sharks never stop swimming, but there are some species that do have to have constant movement of water over their gills or they would essentially suffocate. As a result, some of these species have been observed holding themselves stationary within a current and allowing the water to do the work while they take a break! (Possibly to sleep)

11 years ago
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Broadcast spawning...It's incredibly and a surprisingly effective strategy for organisms in an aqueous environment. So, word to the wise; no beating off in the swimming pool! Because you never know!

11 years ago
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nevermind that.... so any other weird animal sex information?

11 years ago
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Moose masturbate rubbing their antlers on any nearby trees.

11 years ago
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BEST THREAD EVER!

Back on the subject of giraffes, a male has a built in Bear Grylls approved fertility test. If he wants to get jiggy, he will nudge a female around her genitals with his head to try to induce her to urinate. He will then cop a mouthful of this fresh piss and can tell if she is in oestrus.

Also, elephants have prehensile cocks Meaning they have some degree of muscular control over them and can utilise them as such!

11 years ago
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ummhh i do believe someone outweirded me o3o

anyway how can they tell that by the urine also you mean that they can use their dick like they use their nose?

11 years ago
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I'm not weird, I just study biology and essentially the two fundamental concepts, to me, in biology are sex and death.

Haven't researched how giraffes do it, but I would assume much like any fertility/pregnancy test it is hormonal based. There will be some trace or metabolite of a hormone in the urine that the male can detect presumably through taste.

As for the elephants, yeah, they can use their junk like their trunk by all accounts.

Another weird one. The life of a male deep sea angler fish. You know the ones? big, sharp scary teeth with that dangly bioluminescent lure above it's gaping maw...Well that's the female. The male is a tiny little blob, essentially little more than a floating scrotum. His aim is simply to find a female. There he will latch on to her, bore into her and begin parasitizing off of her. In return for this, the male becomes little more than a sperm containing tumour that the female can use to reproduce with. They are either incredibly lucky or incredibly unfortunate.

11 years ago
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then i guess im still the weirdest one around :3

so how would it taste if the female is fertile?

umh...wouldnt that like hurt? isnt it like delicated?

.....wwwwwwwwwwwwhat? that white thingy lives in the deepths of the sea? how do they survive?

11 years ago
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1) Possibly so. I would hate to steal your title

2) No idea, I've never tried it and don't have a giraffes sense of taste for reference anyway. Presumably pleasant enough to give a giraffe a hard-on.

3) Not sure if an elephant penis is as sensitive as a human one. And the fact that they can use it for all sorts of things does not necessarily mean they do.

4) They invariably don't. A male has no digestive tract, it swims and is lucky enough to find a female or it dies.

11 years ago
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1)yyyyyeah i can tell why that would arouse them

2)maybe they grab..................uhhh......ehh....nevermind

3)so they are like sperms....that make more sperms?

11 years ago
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What about a snake? Think about it.

11 years ago
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snakes have dongs?

11 years ago
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I think two? O.o

11 years ago
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(looks on google) i see... yeah i think they can reach that the real problem woulb be not bitting it or them

11 years ago
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NOOO!! I don't think his spine is capable of doing that

11 years ago
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Only if its a zombie giraffe from the hit game Resident Evil 6.

11 years ago
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oh well looks like noone else is minding my noonsense anymore so ill stop bumping this up

im still glad that a random tough about self felatio gave me like 2 hours of fun and educational comments :3

11 years ago
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Closed 11 years ago by altair17305.