Hi everybody,

I'm looking for honest feedback.

The Reality Next Door book series with the portal fantasy genre. A total of 21 books, and a, now unknown number, of side stories with lore. The first book is called The Chosen One Next Door. You can read a new chapter every weekday on a platform called Royal Road.

Here is the synopsis
Hello diary,
These journey entries may be my last entries. The chance is great that I’m going to die soon, and along with me, all existence. My name is Eros, and I am preparing for the final fight to save the existence as we know it. Perhaps I’m getting ahead of myself. You see, my name wasn’t always Eros.

It might be best to start at the beginning, instead of the ending. My name is also Steve. Originally, I ran a bakery. I had a lot of money and my life seemed to be just perfect. That is, until my ex-wife Haley died. Things like that can turn a man sour. But not only that, I felt as if I had a secret hiding within me.

Depression hit me like a hard brick, though it seems so long ago now. A shadow man started to hunt me and things went from bad to worse. An epic journey awaited me, a journey that would not only change me, but would also change the fate of everyone I would meet during my journey. This is my journal entry that details my many adventures. I will call this entry, the chosen one, next door.

P.S. I have learned about many things by now what happened aside from my own journey. I’m adding these interludes to the diary since Clara keeps pressing me to do so. In these interludes, I will tell you a part of the journey from another person’s perspective.

Would you like to read more? It’s free! https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/70818/the-chosen-one-next-door

1 year ago

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I've read a few chapters till now. It is quite entertaining. Also the author is very active, published chapters in a regular basis and answers in nearly every comment. Good work, keep writing!

1 year ago
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Thank you so much for your encouraging words! I'm thrilled to hear that you find the story entertaining. Your support means a lot to me. I'm committed to maintaining a regular publishing schedule and engaging with readers like you.

It's readers like you who make writing even more rewarding. I appreciate your encouragement, and I'll definitely keep writing! If you have any thoughts or suggestions as the story progresses, feel free to share. Happy reading!

1 year ago
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I've only read through the prologue and first few chapters at the moment so my feedback will be rather limited.

It's a bit rough to start. The prologue paints an interesting picture of what to expect, but the subsequent content lacks a decent hook. There also seems to be a heavy reliance on dialogue, but rather than feeling organic, it comes across as if the characters are reading from a bullet point presentation at times. Perspective is a bit disjointed with characters thoughts being all over the place as well.

Overall, I'd say it's decently entertaining. I do think the setting is rather interesting too. I'm not sure how it'll come together as things progress but RR is a great place for an author to hone their story over time and refine it. I'll definitely be reading a few more chapters as time permits though.

1 year ago
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Thank you so much for taking the time to share your thoughts on the prologue and initial chapters. Your feedback is truly valuable to me, and I appreciate your honesty. I hear your points about the beginning being a bit rough and the need for a more engaging hook. I'll certainly take that into consideration as I continue to refine and improve the story.

I'm glad you find the setting interesting, and your observation about the perspective and dialogue is duly noted. It's a work in progress, and I'm committed to making it better with each iteration. Rest assured, your insights will be instrumental in shaping the final version.

I'm excited to continue working on the story, addressing the areas you've highlighted. Your support means a lot, and I look forward to sharing a more polished version in the future. Thanks again for being part of this journey with me!

1 year ago
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1 year ago
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Closed 11 months ago by superfluffy.