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So I just lost my best friend...

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bull21

I dunno why am I starting a topic... maybe because this was the 'last' forum I visited. Maybe because this was the last forum I really enjoyed being a part of. Or maybe because I just need to say something, and this seems like a right place to do it.
I had a nasty fallout with my... well no longer, best friend. We've known each other for 15 years, since we were eight years old. We stuck through everything, bad and good, and then things just fell apart. Within few days everything that ever connected us, everything that ever made us friends just disappeared. It would be a lie to say that he was the only one who let his bad side come out but I have a such an ugly feeling. Emptiness, sadness... like someone stabbed me right in the chest and I'm struggling to take even one breath. It's scary because he was one of those friends you think are going to be your friends for life and you call brothers. What is even worse is that it happened so fast. Like a blast, out of nowhere it just felt like someone swept the rug from our feet and... it's awful. In a big way, it's my fault. I was the one who got pissed because he got the habit of always being late and started making fun of me for no apparent reason in some things. After the last mistake he made (not showing up and letting me stand on rain for an hour and not even apologising for it and even worse, making it look like I'm overreacting) I got pissed and tried to explain him where he made a mistake but all he thought was that I was furious over money (5€ i paid for ticket). When I tried to explain my thoughts he ridiculed me and I just flipped and...
I know this isn't 'that' type of forum but this is the last forum I've really enjoyed and I just needed somewhere to vent it out. I'm lost. Last few hours I've spent mostly staring at wall trying to see where things went awry, where the shit hit the fan. I have to admit I'm scared. I'm hard on people and find it really hard to befriend anyone. I... I'm just scared...
Edit: Thanks guys, I'm really feeling much better now! So much better that I'm gonna start trolling the forum any moment now! :D

THANKS for all the nice comments! :)

11 years ago*

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51 Comments
mercer88

Sentimentese isn't my first language. Could someone translate 'friend' - seems to be this weird concept I don't understand.

11 years ago
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NB264

Apparently you two grow apart, even if you did not notice that. Your friend was more casual, and you were the emotional one. Those two can not function properly if both sides do not make an effort to respect their differences. I'll agree with everything GoJays2025 said above, except one thing - it has to be, partially, your fault. You can't have an argument without two sides. I'm not saying you should blame yourself, but maybe you should consider if you were (and I'm saying this only in the light of your topic, and things that you wrote here) a bit needy and clingy? If you are sure that is not the case, then f*ck them. Everyone has to find a best friend, and everyone has to lose one. That's life.

11 years ago
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bull21

I take my part of responsibility. I wasn't a diva but I was demanding one thing - respect. I deserved some respect, I've been there for him in many dire situations, I stood beside him when nobody else did. We were friends but I guess that you're right - we grew apart; but nevertheless I always showed him respect and I treated him the way I treat my brother! Alas it's not the end of the world. I'm really happy I opened this topic as many showed their support and it means a a lot to me. I made mistakes, we all do, but unlike him I was, and always will be, able to admit my mistakes and apologise for them. He, on the other hand, never will and I hate that. I will not be a friend to someone who's only capable of criticising other people but never really looking at his own reflection in the mirror.

11 years ago
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Scarcheg

When I've read the title of this topic, I thought that your friend is DEAD. Later, when I read it, I just wanted to say to you, that nothing is over. You both are alive, guys :)) You can forgive each other and continue your friendship. I think you've just overreacted a little bit.

11 years ago
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Peroxide

+1

I felt bad and then I realized it was just highschool drama, even though the numbers that the OP gave would put them in their 20s.

I'll probably have a bunch of people jump on me, but the way you describe what he's done to you sounds like something a girl would say about her boyfriend..

11 years ago
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bull21

Nobody will jump at you. You're probably one of those people who don't care all that much about other people. I guess that's what makes a difference between people like you and me. I care for my friends, people I'm with and people I (if need rises) one day can rely upon. I can easily be asshole to everyone, but I find it much more effective and enjoyable to be friendly to people. Especially with people I call friends. Hf. Topic is closing now.

11 years ago
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Closed 11 years ago by bull21.