That's no fun. Get well soon!

Hello! I notice that you never came back with feedback. As I'm planning on doing another whitelist giveaway of this game, and I updated the story, I'm letting you know so if you want to drop by some feedback I'll add you to the list, even though this giveaway ended!
Also, I hope you're feeling better!

Thanks for the feedback. I'm thinking it will end up as a short story, perhaps in a series. That would both give a bit of background on the characters and explain why Eman is attached to Sunset. I like to do multiple stories from the different characters' perspectives, since I write mostly in first person, so perhaps I'll suffix this story with the story of the two meeting... now I have more to write. -_-

That is the plan, since Verveeri wants to know how the characters are related. I'll probably write a prologue.
Edit: Done, sort of.

I have completed another story and part of another is ready, in case you want to read more!

I reworked the sentence to be a bit stronger. I also added an introduction to the characters.

In case you're still interested, I added an introduction to the first story and started working on another.

Just what I wanted to comment about too. :P
It would be definitely more practical if the machines used some other, or at least additional form of picking up on environment, like echolocation or infrared sensors. Might be a good occasion to say how they tell androids apart from humans. Then again, maybe that flaw is intentional on the machines' part, considering sentence near the beginning of the story:

If they cared, they could reclaim the entire continent (planet?) and eliminate humanity all together, but they held back, regulating their numbers and resource usage for some unknown reason, developing more and more machines of roughly equivalent strength but esoteric designs.

The crimson blood is actually from the protagonist's cut hands. I'll revise to make that clearer. Thanks!

Revised the scene in the factory to eliminate the lights (which were a bit silly) and replaced them with the equally non-sensical but less silly red lights.

Also, I am aware that solar power is not actually a feasible source of power for giant death robots, despite what the hippies say. I'm experimenting with having Sunset use power cells, tell me if you think it's a better explanation. Now I just need to find a reason for the robots to be less active at night.

In case you're interested, I worked on another story or two in the series.

I'm not offended; I asked for feedback, and I'd be more offended if I didn't get any. I'll take a look at that sentence, and I'll work on more background in a bit.

Also, this is one of my favorite VN's. I don't play the genre much... it might be the only one... but I think it's one of the best examples of story in gaming that I've ever played. I also, uh, like androids a lot. That might factor in.

Thank you for the feedback! I've added some more content to the stories in case you're interested.

I think I've double checked a good deal of the original story. The new one is rough (because, you know, fresh rough draft, hot off the press) but if you find anything particular with the original please let me know so I can fix it up!

I'll probably work on it today.

Probably.

Hey, what do you know, I actually did!

In case you didn't see, I added another story and started a third.

Ah, yes, still haven't finished that yet. It ends a bit abruptly because I'm procrastinating on it.

I completed that scene and a couple others, if you're interested.

So now I have a third story to write. Yay?

There is now some additional content on the introductory story and another piece from Mole with his perspective, if you're still interested. (Disclaimer: None of the stories are technically finished, and Mole's story ends abruptly.)

Go ahead, I'm trying to improve anything that might make the story better, so specifics show me where exactly I can modify things to make them better.

Hello! I worked on the introduction and added more content. If you are still interested, let me know if you think it's improved; I think I knocked off some of the rust, so it might be more interesting now.

Hello! I notice that you never came back with feedback. As I'm planning on doing another whitelist giveaway of this game, and I updated the story, I'm letting you know so if you want to drop by some feedback I'll add you to the list, even though this giveaway ended!

Hello! I notice that you never came back with feedback. As I'm planning on doing another whitelist giveaway of this game, and I updated the story, I'm letting you know so if you want to drop by some feedback I'll add you to the list, even though this giveaway ended!

I was writing as I was brainstorming, and I changed the scene a bit as I was actually writing it out. I'll work on making that consistent. The bunker wasn't originally meant for one person and one android- hence the everyone. However, I never revealed what happened to the others, so it doesn't make sense that Eman would assume that Sunset was responsible, being a machine and all.