Description

THE ZIGGURAT OF DISAPPOINTMENT™, NORMAL END.

Behind a desk, with some papers in his hand, is an unassuming little man. What's left of his hair is grey. He is flanked by controls and screens, likely displaying the output of all sorts of security cameras. Judging by his uniform he is probably a guard or a night watchman for the ZIGGURAT OF DISAPPOINTMENT™.

At your approach he shifts slightly, stifling a yawn. Apparently he was sleeping.

Oh, hello, there you are. Took your time, didn't you. Been watching you for days, feels like.

I put on some tea, once you made it down to this, this forgotten storage I guess you'd call it. Nobody's ever going to need any of these things, but they keep piling up, you know. Sometimes it feels like I'm in storage myself.

Thought you might be thirsty. But you were going so slowly. And there's not much to do down here, you know?

Know how many times I've gone through these company newsletters? Comes out every month. Think I'm the only one who still reads them. Complete waste of paper.

You know, they used to have recipes? It was that sort of company, once. Smaller. With actual people, you know? Oh, I could tell you some things about people...

Say, when you were up in the warehouse, did you happen to notice a place called Dennis? No, course not. Anyway, you know what it means?

That clever fellow with the Hafnium? Know who he is? No, he's not Dennis. Dennis hasn't been around for ages. Someone said they heard he'd died. I don't know. Doesn't matter.

No, no, Dennis used to work there, in the warehouse. And right at his desk, so you could scan it, DENNIS. Maybe he was here at the start? I dunno. Before me, anyway.

So that guy you met, he's the guy who got Dennis's job, after the guy who got Dennis's job left. Maybe there was another one in between, can't remember any more.

So now when people read DENNIS, they don't know. It's just a funny location.

Sorry. It's the job, you know. Most days there's nothing to do. Finally get to talk to someone, and I can't shut up.

Anyway, today I watched some poor soul wandering around lost. Drank all the tea myself. And then I fell asleep. That was my whole day.

I'd make another pot but you're ready to move on, right? To see the precious Ziggurat?

Well, it's right there, through the door and up you go. To the Toppermost of the Poppermost. The Sanctum Sanctorum. I could even show you around. It's just...

Are you sure you want to see it? It's not much to look at, really. I don't know why anyone would bother.

Look, you've been walking a long time. Snooping around all sorts of places you shouldn't. Seen a few interesting corners. Maybe got a story to tell your friends.

But you've been thinking, haven't you? As you made your way around. What you might see when you finally reach it? It's going to be amazing, right? Surely worth all this trouble, right?

Well, let me spell it out for you. That Ziggurat? The one you imagined? That's the one you should remember. That's the one you should tell your friends about.

Why? Tell me, why do you think they call it the ZIGGURAT OF DISAPPOINTMENT™? Because it's so wonderful? Because it's so incredible?

No, if it was like that they'd call it the Ziggurat of Peace Love and Happiness, Praise Jesus Amen. You get me?

Look, why don't I take you outside? You find your car and go home. Wouldn't you rather do that? Just make up a nice ending to the story yourself?

No? Well, you've got to be sure. Really sure. There's no changing your mind once we're inside. When you're in, you're in.

Just don't say I didn't warn you. About the disappointment.

I got quite lost on the way here. Even turned myself around once.

6 years ago