Choo Choo 2: The Sequel!

My last date as a single person was in 1987, so...

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Your question is not easy to answer.... depends on much things.
What did you like, what did she like, how long you know each other and how "strong/good" (over friends are "closer" then only talked to at a supermarket as examples), in which country did you live and so on.

In germany, in general, the male must make the first step and the society and the females expect that you pay.
I done that everytime as i was younger and the results was not really great.
So i changed it and be very friendly, open her the door and such things but split the bill (i wonder me how much write that this is normal for them). To split the bill is only a test for me to see how she reacts in that moment and the days after. First you see if she expected that you pay all (a part of the females like free cinema/dinner and such things and sometimes talking with you and so on are then the "price" they pay for it -i don't want loose lifetime with such females-) and the days after you see if she wants talk/write/meet you again with the fact that she not get all for free^^.
At the second date i pay normaly all and be a real gentleman :o) (if she liked the first Masafor she love the second :-D)

But all at all i prefer to make a date, if both want it, by her or me and we cook together. It's more relaxed, never really silence, she and you see how the other one react in a, maybe, bit stressful situation and at the same time in a relaxed one (hard to explain but i am sure you know that cooking can be relaxing but sometimes needs a bit of hurry by different things fill in, take the head down or anything like this :D). Sometimes you can look at her much longer then by a normal dinner and see much more from the "inner" person.
The selfcooked stuff is mostly much more liked then the buyed.
And trust me love goes throught the stomach :o) (make her a dessert works REALLY good)
As a little extra ... poem is very liked too. But only if you feel it not play it/tell the same each female (like the really bad ones of "your eyes are like a mountain sea/stars/sun" and such "ugly" stuff). So please, with sugar on top, not gaudy/tawdry.

Reciept for a really easy dessert:
chocolate muesli in a pan, make it hot, sugar to it (NO FAT -that is very important because if you use fat and the muesli got later cold it gets very hard)-, dont let it burn and let it be hot for around 2-3 min. Then put a part in glasses, over it cream, then fruits (cherrys or anything like that) and then repeat as long as it needs to have the glasses nearly full. The optical presentation points too :o). Best served if it is already warm.

If you make the muesli with fat you can make cereal bars, i experimenting with it but not 100% pleased with my results so i can't give you a good advice for one that is not sooo hard and longliving. When anyone testing around and find a way please contact me.

So all in all .... have a battleplan (we are males we need such stuff) but be ALWAYS yourself :o)
-and be prepared on the fact that no battleplan overlife the first contact with the "enemy" :DDDDD gigglng- (i make more jokes that i take it serious)

Thanks for the train :o)

Joined few, thank you for the chance. Best of luck on date. From my experience it is in good taste to offer paying for the meal, but if other side wants to pay then I'm not pressuring. Don't know any good tips, I'm still looking myself.

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Bump. Thanks for the train, Melrir.

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Can't help with dating advice, but have a bump <3

Thanks for the train!

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I have a suggestion. First dates, especially dinner dates, can be a lot of pressure, not just for you but her as well. Maybe doing something more casual, in the afternoon like a museum with lunch or an outing to a park, or a street fair. You get the idea - a relaxing shared experience rather than sitting across a table of food trying to think of what to talk about. It also makes your questions regarding dress easy to resolve since it's going to be casual. As for paying, if I invite someone out, I assume that I am going to foot the bill - it has nothing to do with who is the man or woman, but who did the inviting. Good luck and I hope it all goes well for you and thank you for the giveaways :)

First of all, make sure she knows that you're going for a date. Funny as it seems, I have been once asked by a guy that I met on a trip 2 years before to meet and talk about stuff like friends (because we kind of became friends during the trip and two years later met each other accidentally on the university). I agreed. After I arrived I've been given a single tulip and invited for a 3 hour walk in the park. So I've been carrying the cheap flower for three hours and at the end of the walk, it was pretty much dead. So, there's another advice - if you want to give her something, think it over. Not only I was mad, because it wasn't supposed to be a date, but also I've been given a shitty gift which I had to drag along. Well, the dude was smart, because he knew that I wouldn't agree for a date (he kinda fell for me during the trip and I turned him down as gently and politely as I could because of reasons) and he expected that even if he forces the date on me I'll turn him down again, so he bought a tulip for like 50cents (they were sold cheap everywhere in town, because of the upcoming Woman's Day, so he made no effort). Also during the walk he wasn't listening to me, he was staring at me and nodding to everything I say. It was creepy and I had the feeling that either the guy doesn't have his own opinions or I'll never get to know them, because he desperately wants to show me that we have similar points of view. So, third advice, be yourself and talk openly. There's nothing worse than pretending. If you base your relationship on dishonesty, it can only get worse. If she likes you the way you are - you're lucky, if not - let her go. Finally after I told the guy that I feel offended that he lied to me and turned him down again, he tried to grab me and kiss me in the middle of the street. I evaded that and after asking him angrily why would he do that, he sad that he had nothing to lose. He also wanted to walk me home, which I denied and ran to the tram. I don't want to think what else he would try, because he had nothing to lose. Of course I blocked him on Facebook (he added me after meeting me on the university), because I got scared. Last advice, if you're desperate, you're going to scare women away. Don't think that they own you anything.

Sorry for such a long post and boring you with details, but I thought that it would make more sense and be more believable if I told you the whole story.

If I were to answer your questions, for a first date I'd prefer a public place like a cinema or museum, as I'd feel safer around other people in case the guy had some crazy ideas. That also would allow both of us to dress casually, which is nice, because you get to know each other's styles and that gives a nice first impression. In case of paying, I'm an equalist and I like to pay for myself. I don't like to force all expenses on a man, especially if I don't know how it will end up. But, it depends who are you taking for a date. I can imagine that some girls would feel offended if you asked them to pay.

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Thank you for the nice and long train, Melrir and have a bump! ^^

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Good luck for you.
Thank you for the train!

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