Happy Cake Day! Don't worry, I hope everything will sort out and you will get better.If you have really close friends they won't leave you no matter what. Even if you have only one good friend it's good :)
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Happy cake day! You've a great story and as a soft soul myself you almost moved me to tears. Keep going strong, m8.
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Happy Cake Day! I admire you for the persistence on dream and hope your condition won't get worse.
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As I'm usually not talkative either, I will just say "Thank you" as you do ;)
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We all get sad and scared from time to time, and I understand some people can only get out of this situation with the help of other people. I don't know if a random stranger's words will make you feel better, but I wish you the best! Look at all your problems in the face, close your fingers and punch them right in the eye! Show them who's boss! Don't let all these motherf*ckers take control of your life!
P.S. Happy cake day!
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Happy Cake Day and thank you for your giveaways!
Is studying Ancient History and Egyptology the same as being an archaeologist for example like Zahi Hawass (I have seen him a lot of times on National Geographic Channel and Discovery Channel)?
I hear there are interesting new developments in the tomb of Toetankhamon (hidden chambers).
I'm sorry to hear what you have been through but know that there always will be family, friends and other people that have your back. I can't know what the real day to day impact is on your personal life as I don't have Cerebral Palsy but I can talk about me personally, I have been recently diagnosed with something that has me going every day for a total of nearly 2 months to the local hospital in the mornings and I come back at home around noon vomiting and having diarrhea.It's not painless and the side effects of this procedure are a real nuisance but I know that there's is only one road to take and that's the road forward. I'm happy every day is a new day as there are a lot of people out there who never have a new day anymore. What I'm trying to say is that every day one live's is a day more to live. Talking to and confiding in your family and friends that you really trust is a vital part to move further. Also having something that you are really interested in like Ancient History and Egyptology is something also vital as it keeps you busy.
Sorry if this sounds condescending but it's really not my intention to do so. I really hope your condition will stabilize!
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Thank you. :) <3
Yes, in a way, although I don't think very highly of Zahi Hawass due to his ties to Mubarak and his "commercial branding" of Egyptology/Archaeology. :3
and indeed, the developments with Tutankhamen's tomb are exciting! :)
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Happy Cakeday!!!
Keep thinking positive and believe that you condition would get better..
At least for now you have something to look forward for summer break.. ;)
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Hey Kyle!
First, Happy Cakeday!
and then thank you for telling all of this private things here
i know i could not
what i don't understand though
some of your friends don't talk to you anymore bc you attempted suicide?
hm... well, you know them better, ofc, but.. are you sure you need them? good friends should not turn their backs on you in such a situation...
but i hope they come back to you soon, if you miss them so much
and i wish you alle the best for your future!
I hope we can read a happier Post next Year! :3
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Thank you. :)
It's a bit more complicated, but I think it's more the case that they have to back away sometimes because it pains them so much to see me in the state I get into sometimes. It's okay though, since I started this discussion, a few have said hello again. Today has turned into a really great Cake Day. :)
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glad to hear that your friends return and your cakeday was nice :3
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Hey, I don't think we've bumoed into eachother a lot in the past, so it was nice to get to know you a little now. You seem like an incredibly interesting guy. Great ambitions even though you have to work hard for them due to your illness. It sounds like emotionally you're not always as stable. Hopefully you'll be able to control the fear of losing loved ones and focus on the positve things! c ya!
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Hey Waxlor, I've seen you around, but indeed we haven't really gotten to know each other. ^^
I like to think I'm interesting, so hopefully I can live up to it. :)
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Happy cake day, thanks for being so generous. :)
I'm sorry to hear about your health, I hope that you're able to find some peace and happiness. Depression sucks, I've struggled with health issues myself and depression was definitely the most taxing on my body/mind. While it may not ever fully go away, it definitely does get better. I know at my lowest I couldn't imagine myself ever being happy again, but after reaching out and helping myself get better in any way possible, brick by brick, I slowly started to smile again and not feel so suffocated 24/7. My physical health didn't improve, if anything it got worse, but I was able to get some control over the depression which helped my body overall. As time goes by you'll find things that help manage it so that it doesn't spiral down so fast, but having a support system is so important. I hope you're able to find either family or friends who are there for you no matter what happens, and try to let those who aren't in your life for the long haul go. Even if it's just a couple who you can count on to always be there.
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Happy cake day Kylar! Sorry you've had a rough time lately. As someone who knows what its like to have a hard time making friends I encourage you to hang in there. I went most of my life without a single friend, but eventually I ended up bumping into people who had common interests which made conversations much easier. And you know this community will always be here for you :)
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Man, I love Egypt. Their monuments and buildings are nothing short of beautiful.
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Couldn't agree more. Won my heart at the age of six, never looked back since. :)
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happy cake day to you mate :)
ancient history and egyptology. thats some interessting stuff.
you seem like a nice guy and i wish you nothing but the best for your future
see you around!
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I just took a break from studing but i gotta go back to it due to having little time & midterms tomorrow . So unfortunately i couldnt read what you clearly spent time on writing. I am truely sorry for that but i will read that tomorrow you have my word :) Happy cake day mate
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As a fellow student, I can appreciate the pressure of study ;) Best of luck, and thank you. :)
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Hey there folks,
So I'm pretty sure most of you won't know who I am, and that's okay. For those of you who have noticed me around SteamGifts though - probably most likely through the giveaways I do each month - I reached my first "Cake Day" today. So I thought I might take some time to reflect on what has happened over the past year for me, both in terms of my time here on SteamGifts and in the much larger scheme of things, as well as where I hope to be by this time again next year.
For those of you who intend to read on, prepare for a long read. As it is my "Cake Day", I'll break my usual habit of making a big batch of giveaways each month and instead make a few short GAs for the occasion, which will be linked as follows:
Feel free to share the links around for celebration purposes. :)
Wait, who even are you?
Good question. My name's Kyle, I'm a male second-year undergraduate student at University College London studying Ancient History and Egyptology. I'm disabled, afflicted with Cerebal Palsy, which leaves me without the ability to walk and thus I have to use a wheelchair. I love video games (obviously, that's why I'm here), but I also enjoy reading, writing, debating and bonding with others over a variety of topics.
I'm a soft soul, and I have no shame in admitting that and letting that be who I am. It's why I'm so charitable - even though one could easily argue I have much better things I could spend my money on - and I enjoy bringing something nice to other people. So that's why I'm here.
If you want to know more about me, just ask away. I'll try and answer any and all questions as best I can. :)
SteamGifts, the Past Year and I: A Reflection
The easiest thing to do to start, I think, is look at the statistics. So, since joining over a year ago, I've given out over 350+ games, winning back just shy of the same amount. I'm currently Level 8 (8.52 to be exact), and I've been added to 336 whitelists as opposed to 10 blacklists. I've been added to many groups as well as removed from a few over time.
While I haven't talked and socialised very much with a lot of the people I've met, I've come to respect a lot of people just by reading what they say and seeing what they do. There are many wonderful people on this site, and I'm glad I've been able to meet just some of them. For those who've blacklisted me and / or removed me from their groups, I can respect that. I don't hold any grudges. I do enter a lot of giveaways without saying much, and when I do win I usually just keep it to a "Thank You <3" unless I feel I have something to say. I know some people don't like that, and I respect that. I do.
But it doesn't mean my thanks and gratitude are not sincere, and most of the time I don't say things because I don't feel like I have anything to say, and I feel it would be an insult if I was to say something that was half-assed or not sincere.
Still, I'm grateful for all the opportunities and successes I've had, both here on SteamGifts and in my real life.
In the past year I've made so many friends, some of them very close. I've learnt so many new things both inside and outside of my degree studies, and I've achieved many things. I recently got elected the President of my Model United Nations Society. This coming Friday I have an interview to potentially join the British Museum Friends Advisory Council, which takes me a step closer to my dream of one day being the Director, a dream which I've held since the age of ten. From the friends I've made I'll finally be escaping Europe this summer, going to the Philippines for a week in July just to enjoy the sun, get drunk off my ass and have fun times.
Warning: This is where things might get a bit deep
Things haven't been all that great though. As a result of my disability I've got a deteriorating body condition. This year I've been diagnosed with dilated cardiomyopathy, as well as clinical depression, after three suicide attempts across November 2015 - January 2016. Those close friends? I'm scared I'm losing them. Even now some of them are refusing to talk to me, and while our mutual friends insist to me that they will be back and won't leave, I'm still incredibly consumed by the fear. I've always struggled to make friends because of who (or perhaps what) I am, and these people are some of the closest people I've ever been to. I know that things change in life, and that we do lose some people along the way, but I don't want to lose these people. I can't bare the thought.
Why am I telling you guys all of this? Maybe it's because I don't really know any of you, so I'm not afraid of the reaction you guys will have. Most of my family - and still a good chunk of my friends - don't know that I've been through all of this. I still don't know how to tell them. I will have to tell them eventually, obviously, but I have to find a way.
So, where to go from here?
I still plan to do giveaways on SteamGifts, at least for the time being. I may have to step away from it one day, but I'll keep on giving for as much as I can. Don't worry about my finances: I always keep an eye on it, and I wouldn't be doing this if I couldn't afford the expense. So let the gifts keep on coming!
As for me, due to my illness I'll be repeating my second year again this coming year. I don't mind that, as it's the most sensible option if I want to get the grades I actually deserve. My department has been incredibly loving and supportive, and I'm grateful to them for that. I don't know what will happen between me and my friends. I'm hopeful things will even out and we'll start talking again soon, If we do, I'm trying to use my worries right now to drive me to do the right thing. I'll want us to focus on all the things that we could do and would like to do together, instead of all the things we shouldn't be doing. I want us to have hope for the potential we have, not despair over our faults, because at the end of the day we're only human.
We shouldn't hate ourselves for that.
Now, enough talking! Enjoy the giveaways, enjoy the cake, just sit back and have fun! Here's to the next year of gifting and fun times. <3
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