A christmas vent with a small train [LV 0+]

I wish I had more kind words for you but sadly life is rather difficult for everyone. The more you deviate from what society, or the mob, considers normal the worse it gets. Not just hard to influence 8 billion people to change, it's impossible. Just don't focus on it and try to enjoy life.
Cheers

You're still young, many chances to have a nice christmas ahead of you hopefully :) But I'm really sorry to hear of your difficult family situation right now.

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I think I've finally found my long lost twin brother. Sadly I see so much of my past in your words. I'm a dysfunctional being from a dysfunctional family. But I'm older. Don't think of the path ahead, just on the step you're doing. I think I see glimpses of a good spirit too, hold on that.
I hope your grandma recovers soon and well.

@httrenard Reading this made my eyes water and also made me smile at the same time.

I just joined this community this month and you're right, the amount of positivity it's bringing is unreal. I've had all forms of harassments and abuse and I'm glad to say this site and some other communities I found on discord are really a healing pattern for me!

I am happy you're having fun and thank you so much for the train :) the value to it isn't money you spend, but the love you put in it.

boop

There is always hope. Mental illness runs in my family and while many of my relatives still refuse treatment (it's a big family), others like myself have been able to get stable on treatment. My mother has only recently accepted treatment in the last couple years. Either way, I think you can still carve a good life out for yourself in the future. You can fill your life with people who you care about and who care about you!

bump

Things usually turn better, after you can distance yourself from the negative effect of others - you can absolutely have a christmas of your liking in the future :)

Welp, that resonates with me more than I'd like to admit. The fact, that you can name not only your mother's mental illness but also your own at your age and the way you describe your grandmother, gives me hope that you will find better ways to cope with it than I did. Please give your granny a hug from me when you visit her! It is so important to have at least that one person to love and look up to, who sees you, believes in you and loves you back.

Happy holidays nonetheless! :)

P.S.: kinda disappointed by the "christmas vent" without John McLane...

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I feel so sad and sorry for you.Hope 2025 turns out to be a good year for you.Dont give up or give in.Stay Positive and things will hopefully improve for you.Virtual Hugs from me too.

Hope your mothers get better soon... Hug the ones you love whenever you can!

Cheers!

I know everyone's experiences are different and it's unfair and unhelpful to compare them but for what it's worth I didn't really get my stuff figured out till I was around 30 but it did eventually happen for me, I hope you get there too some day regardless of how long it might take for you with any luck sooner rather than later.

hope your grandma can get well soon, and hope you can have a better next year <3

I hope 2025 proves a better year for you and you can make some forward progress with things ^_^

My mother refused treatment for years - finally, in her sixties, she went on meds and I was able to have a real relationship with her. I was truly grateful for that...

Best wishes for your grandmother's health!

Care for others, but don't forget about yourself.
Find some time alone, away from everyone for a bit, outside of the house, and try to relax.

I am sadly in a very similar situation, im 21 and still live with my family, which is not ideal, we've been having all sorts of problems, i have a 6 year old brother, the age difference is devastating, i feel more as a father to him than a brother, and this is accentuated by the fact that we both haven't had present fathers in our life, so the attachment has made it pretty hard for me to branch out onto the world, then covid and all that shit left me with mental scars i feel i won't heal anytime soon which sounds stupid the more years that go by since then, but oh well, i guess what i'm going towards is that:
Life has been pretty shit for a while now, but we are still here, try to make the best of it if you can, even if you don't think you yourself can do anything about your current situation, maybe luck will, there's always a chance.
I would say the same as JMM72, i found that i am a dysfunctional human with a dysfunctional family, which is not convenient at all, but like i said, we need to make the most of it, every life is a unique story, not everyone can get the ideal one hahaha

PS: Also i forgot, i hope your grandma has a speedy recovery and still has many years ahead of her, i fear for mine constantly, she is the pillar that keeps the family together i think, i do not know what it is but anytime she is around, the atmosphere is a bit mor harmonious.

You know, in its way, Steamgifts is also a dysfunctional family. Some members are paranoid, others are....well let's say not nice to read.

But ultimately we all share the same common interest, video games!

Joke aside, my family was very dysfunctional and Christmas was(and still is to a small degree) also a very hard moment.

Take things slowly, endure as you can, and take shelter when you can (at least, that 'works' for me)

Sending positive thoughts!

Hoping your grandmother's condition improves and you can spend some quality time together over the holidays, the most important thing is that you find a space (real or virtual) where you can breathe and centre yourself at this most stressful time of the year. Selflessness might be a virtue for some but not if it puts you into a deeper hole, ultimately we can only help others who are prepared to help themselves, otherwise we just end up dragged into their maelstrom. You just need to manage your situation best you can until things change.

They say it's the most wonderful time of the year (though obviously the people who wrote that don't work in retail), I used to believe that but now my feelings are mixed. All that said, I hope you have the best Christmas you can and best hopes for the new year. 👍

I can relate a bit- mental illness, my grandma as mother figure (who sadly passed away... 2 years now. Feels like yesterday)... but the disfunction and your moms difficulties on top i cant really imagine the full picture.

But i think you will do well. Reason i do is how even still young you come off with a positive outlook. When i was younger with maybe half your troubles i was a wreck of pure doom and gloom (and went to really dark places)- a lot i couldnt handle or figure on my own (like not being diagnosed) but part of it i couldve done better with a better mindset- and that last part i get the feeling you have. Im not making your problems small and i can only imagine how sad you often feel, but you sound grounded- youre sad because of sad things that its alright to feel sad about. We cant control all things in life but we can try our best to try making the best out of it- and you sound like a good son and grandson, maybe owning some of that to your grandma as well, and i think that gives you a strenght you may not realize you have that will see you through all of this.

Could be just a impression sure, but i get that impression from you. I have chronic depression and talked a lot with people going through depression (chronic or otherwise) and i dont know wether that applies to you but you dont seem/read like someone going throught the worst of it(depression i mean)- even if you are, understandably, you sound like someone who can still see whats positive- wich from my experience is the best way to handle things and pretty much a certainty its only a matter of time until you start managing all that better.

Never lose hope, look foward to the future, you have a whole lot of life still ahead of you. I think you can do well despite all the issues weighting you down. My tip is when the time comes to move out, job etc- you try doing your best to help with your family but only to a point, as long as it doesnt drag you down. Try what you can, make peace with what you cant, just dont sacrifice yourself or your future options just trying to mend or keep hold of it all.

I dont know if my intuition is right but i feel you have what it takes. I hope things get better soon

Its always nice seeing nice new users come along- that overwhelming positive thing youre scared? Dont. I feel like youre at the right place and fits right in, you feel that just because you have good reasons to feel that frequent sadness. And that is alright btw. It actually makes us good to feel sad about what its sad and not bury it all deep inside- so long as we dont bury ourselves in that sadness.

Im glad you joined us, i hope to see you amongst us for a long while. Welcome!

I hope that you still receive some warmth from the people around you. Have a merry christmas :)

I can relate to some things, so I hope your situation improves soon.
A hug for you too
heart to heart hug♥
Best regards 🎅🎁🎇