Here's a brief quote from each of the six Steam reviews:

"This game has alot of problems but i know the dev of this game and he built this game as a re-make based on a really old game that he liked when he was younger." - the dev's best bud review.

"This is a bad unfinished game." - the short negative review

"HELLO EVERYBODY ITS ME WOODLANDFAEIETRUCK HERE WITH ANOTHER BUNDLE GAME REVIEW, SO PUT YOUR HANDS ON YOUR DECK THEN QUICKLY REMOVE THEM BECAUSE THAT IS PERVERTED!!@@" - the "do you really review games by typing in all caps and with cheesy jokes? really?!" review

"It's not a really great game, but at the same time, it's a weird change of pace from what we're all used to in gaming, and I think that deserves some attention." - the sensible and competent negative review.

"Not good even for a laugh." - the better short negative review.

"I really wanted to like this. but its just very bad. gameplay bad,and there is no story." - the third short negative review that is so short that I just quoted the entire review and my description of the review is longer than the review review.

Bonus review:

"I don't think you should try to win this game. It's probably really, really bad. I haven't played it though, so you have to decide how much weight to give my review." - my review.