Confused?

As we all know, Valentine's Day is coming and because not everyone is a smoking hot sexy bear like me, i've made this. Yes, this is for you. So this will be a guide for those who want company or even something more on Valentine's Day. This guide is open to anyone, so yeah enjoy! ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ

Previous 2015 Valentine's Summoning Thread Here


Who to summon What to do
PsychoClown Put a lot of make up in your face.
SexyJesus Your body must be bread and your blood must be wine. Pretty easy, uh?
Cjcomplex Wait.. 2 Jesus?
Midnightshooter Make your own wolf pack, he will try to join.
TempeteJoachim Do you call yourself a street DJ too?
AdamZombie Once again, be a zombie if you can handle it.
SquireZed You know the Dead Sea? Be more salty than that.
Partypooperwastaken He likes party and poop, pretty obvious.
Leonidas56 Say something bad about Undertale.
Olfox1 Lick your kitchen furniture.
JustArchi Code a bot better than Archi. Destroy mankind.
TreeB Just have the bandana number 1. Reference.
Jbondguy You know what an ice cube is? Melt it with your hand.
Yeliena Show that booty. (Must have a nice booty)
Larren101 Stalk her. She'll eventually turn the other cheek.
Faboitas Buy a whole lotta candy.
Khazadson Grow a beard! Yes, even if you are female.
CommissarStrayed You know heresy? JUST DO IT!
SexyBudgie Only a sexy budgie can attract another sexy budgie.
IgotElbows Sacrifice your elbows in the name of Hideo Kojima.
Gabzilla 360 noscope him in CSGO.
TheZooZ Build your own soap fight club.
PraiseRhllor Praise the sun?
SleepyCat Snooze all the time!
Zombiehug You like necro hugs?
Venhiem Are you a purple lady?
Steffke Be Prince Stan!
Elunes Are you B&W in real life?
Rinarin Be cool! :B1:
lforlazy This one is hard. Stay lazy. 24/7.
Luxy Do you like sandwiches?
MuIIins Are you a Gif Source Simulator? Also hating puzzles is a plus!
DeltaBladeX Make a triple sacrifice: Fortix + Fortix 2 + Bad Rats.
Ev Just take a bunch of selfies!
Akash Say its username correctly 3 times in a row.
Kaesestange Belly rubs still work!
Ceebers Destroy your laptop.
Khalaq Scan his QR code.
Ulvercarvalho Be a hypnotic cat!
Fyan Can only be summoned by someone dyslexic.
Xarabas This one is the easiest, just be a god.
Misskpavd Are you fabulous?
MuahahahaMeow Meow seductively.
Rachellove Create a thread called 'Date with Rachel Bundle'!
YunieRozier ▽ Be that guy.
Winthorp △ Be that girl.
Zomby2D If you have 2 dimensions, you are good to go!
Max Thunder Get yourself lightning struck. ???. Profit.
Aeternitas Err, he likes tentacles, so try being an octopus
Marinesloth Water: it's his natural habitat, so be wet.
RedFrix Do you have hats? Exactly.
HiroHiro Be a female feline.
Tumalu Comb your fur and be magnificent like him!
Murk You must like hugging. Like a lot.
MaiteVaati Write '!duel' in latin.
Student123 Buy Barbie Dreamhouse Party and be addicted to it, he will come to play with you!
Zelghadis I hear he likes bears. Mecha bears.
Oddllama You can't ;_;

Disclaimer: I can't be summoned ʕ ͡° ͜ᴥ ͡° ʔ


Disclaimer: If you want a relationship this might not be the right guide for you, this is only for a day/night stand on Valentine's Day. Relationships may evolve from this but I also will not be responsible by what happens after you tried to summon someone.

I will add more to the list thorough time!

Also don't just use my services, leave a bump ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ


If you don't want to be included, do tell me and if I made a typo, please let me know.

8 years ago*

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I can only settle for someone willing to be tortured...i mean tested by experimental puzzles i make.

8 years ago
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TR8-TR!

8 years ago
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You asked for typo's, so...

"...what an ice cube..."
"...can attract another sexy budgie."
"Be Prince Stan!"
"Water: it's his natural habitat..."

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8 years ago*
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Holy sweet baby jesus, my guide worked, I scanned your QR code.. I bow down to you

Thanks a lot, edited, just a small question tho, since language barriers I don't understand why the 'Water:"?

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8 years ago
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There are several ways you could have written that.

Water. It's his natural habitat. (Splitting the two thoughts.)
Water: it's his natural habitat. (Linking the explanatory part to the one-word answer.)
Water; it's his natural habitat. (Connecting both thoughts without quite turning it into one sentence.)
Water, his natural habitat. (Putting it all in one sentence.)

8 years ago
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About 20 years ago, when I moved back to the US. I really could have used you. You seem to have a good grip on this whole English thing. It will forever elude me like all languages.
Edit: I really like how you broke it down. A coworker and I were having a discussion about apostrophes. I believed he has used one improperly. He explained he had not, I did not doubt him but wondered about the rules of the apostrophe. A ton of rules govern the use of them. Even after reading the rules I think I got 6 of 10.... He got a 6 as well. He didn't read the rules pre-test.

8 years ago
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Even I get tripped up by grammar, from time to time, and I'm an English teacher. Being around people who make mistakes in language tends to affect your own use of the language. P

8 years ago
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Will you charge for this lesson?

Thanks for the clarification, I really appreciated it!

8 years ago
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I usually charge $50/hour for my editing services, but this one is a freebie. You're welcome. )

8 years ago
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Phew, I was about to make a deal to instead having to pay with money (in this case, the 50$), I would pay with pictures of me, I'm sure you would think of that as a better deal.

But since you were a good sport, here is a freebie from me too! I also swear I'm not a model

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8 years ago
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While on topic, shouldn't "typo's" be "typos"?
I'm being a nitpicking ass, heh

8 years ago
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Depends on how you're using the word "typo." )

8 years ago
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Are you B&W in real life?

Bear, I love you. xD
Seriously though, thanks for making me smile! :D


Are you a purple lady?

Venhiem, here I am ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

8 years ago*
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That's what I'm here for! ʕᵔᴥᵔʔ


NO WAY, I JUST FOUND OUT YOUR SECRET, you only post B&W selfies because.. you are PURPLE! (;´༎ຶ Д༎ຶ`)

im opening photoshop, wait for the sauce ʕ ͡° ͜ᴥ ͡° ʔ

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8 years ago*
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WHERE DID YOU EVEN GET THAT PRIVATE PIC OF ME D:

Well.... it's close enough :P That might actually be me after I get out of bed.

8 years ago
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Let's just say, I have my skills, I also got more of them private pics, I'm gonna show you, I call it '50 shades of purple' ʕ ͡° ͜ᴥ ͡° ʔ

I also noticed that your current avatar is like a fusion from both selfies you showed here, in the first one you have jacket and in the second one you have one ear showing, in the current one, you have ear shown and jacket xD

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8 years ago
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D: That's.... neat.

Haha yeah I guess you're right. Even more conspiracy: I wore the same shirt and jacket in two of these pics, not combined though :P
Makes me look like I only own two shirts. Ha! I promise, I own more! At least three! At least! Seriously though, I do own more clothes xD

8 years ago*
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Huehuehue, I know I noticed, but I decided no to refer to it, because obviously I'm sure you own more xD I think <_<

PROOF OR DIDN'T HAPPEN! ʕ╭ರᴥ•́ʔ

8 years ago
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Woah, did I fuck up the format at first. I fixed it now though. You didn't see anything!
Gimme a minute D:

8 years ago
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AHAHAHAHAHAH, well that spoiler blank space is now explained xD

inb4 this ▽

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8 years ago
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It was a mistake, okay ಥ_ಥ

8 years ago
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See, that's like.. three shirts or something D:
I may be bad at maths, but I'm no liar. ಠ╭╮ಠ

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8 years ago*
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Very cool choice of shirts! :3

Yes you are, those are not 3 shirts, my eyes can spot only 2 and a half ಠ_ಠ

no way, color photo!

8 years ago
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Thanks :D Left is band shirts and right.. video game / film related ones. I don't own any "normal" shirts though xD nerd
I don't have only half a shirt though :O Your eyes are lying to you.

8 years ago
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That's awesome :3

Sweaters and shirts related with something i have a sweat with Heisenberg's face and name From Breaking Bad, i have a t-shirt with storm troopers, a nirvana one also, a AC DC that is amazing, and i think thats it o:

Imma show you one of my favs! Like tomorrow u.u

8 years ago
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Basically all I wear is those shirts (and if it's cold, I just wear a sweater type of thing under it, like, a t-shirt material kinf of sweater [honestly, I have no idea what these are called in English]) and the jacket we were talking about. I own three of the same jacket, so that's nice, I think :') But yeah, apart from that I have two hoodies, that are also band merch.

Sure :)

8 years ago
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One of my favs was gifted to me in xmas (the one im gonna show you) and its a T-rex face and he is saying 'hug me baby' and its awesome and hilarious :3

8 years ago
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Sounds very cool indeed :D

8 years ago
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How can my eyes lie, if the world isn't a lie? - Bear Jaden 2016

8 years ago
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ಠ_ಠ
What the fuck? - Me, just now

8 years ago
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What did you expect from Bear Jaden? xD

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8 years ago
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I WAS IN A HURRY, OKAY. NO TIME TO MAKE IT B/W ;_;

8 years ago
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HUEHUEHUE, gotta go fast!

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8 years ago
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8 years ago
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We really need to go to sleep xD

HEY YOU CHANGED THE GIF

8 years ago
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Well, you do. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
I've only been awake for like 10 hours :D

8 years ago
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DAMMNIT! Is it still early there, in B&Wland? D:

8 years ago
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Nah. I just got up really, really, really late :P It's half past 3 in the morning here.

8 years ago
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Same here, im lucky that tomorrow is my free day :p

Its almost 3 here too, tsc tsc its late!

8 years ago
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Oh, that's cool then :D

Still... go to bed! :P

8 years ago
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Since you didnt said its yours as well, I will conclude its not a free day for you, YOU REBEL!

I'm going, I'm going :p

8 years ago
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Actually, my whole life is a free day right now. No job until July, soooo yeaaah.

8 years ago
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Well, that sucks ): I'll get you a job, its not paid tho, you wanna be my partner in crime? ʕ ͡° ͜ᴥ ͡° ʔ

8 years ago
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A little. Yes, I do! I'll absolutely be your partner in crime!

8 years ago
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GREAT! ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ

All you gotta do is being a SG smooth criminal

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8 years ago
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And look at you. You look good holding a cigar.

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8 years ago
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Found an even better one. (It's even black and white!)

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8 years ago
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I didn't. You must be hallucinating.
See, you should go to sleep. Told you.

8 years ago
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I should, indeed!

good night, dont let bad bears bite! ʕ ͡° ͜ᴥ ͡° ʔ

8 years ago
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Good night! No one's gonna bite me, not even mosquitos, so I think I'm fine.

8 years ago
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You would be surprised how fast I can infiltrate in someone's house and bite them.. to death..

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8 years ago
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Nah. You wouldn't kill me. You can't talk to me when I'm dead. I mean, you could, but I wouldn't be able to answer, so that would be a very lopsided conversation... which would be pretty boring, I assume.

8 years ago
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I know, I am incapable of that :3
I'm too lazy to do it even if i wanted to

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8 years ago
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Awesome! Two lazy.. individuals; that makes perfect partners in crime!

8 years ago
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We are missing our boss.. yes I have a boss.

She won that spot by being more lazy than me ;_;

a true lazyness master

8 years ago
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Hmmm... The more people know about this, the likier it is that we get caught doing nothing. Just saying.

8 years ago
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I took a picture of you sleeping. I guess you are B&W even when you're sleeping xD

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8 years ago
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D:

8 years ago
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Im sorry D: you eady to see t-rex?

8 years ago
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I am! Show it to meh :D

8 years ago
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ugh usb cable is down, no photos for you ;_;

8 years ago
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Well, that's.. disappointing :/

8 years ago
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Tell me about it ):

Ill have to borrow one from housemates

8 years ago
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Just messing with you! Don't worry about it :)

8 years ago
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I will, not because of only you, but because of mostly me, I only had one of them ;_;

RIP, imma cry myself to sleep today

8 years ago
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Aw man, that sucks! RIP you and RIP usb cable.
You'll both be dearly missed.

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8 years ago
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Fake photo.
Not black & white.
Therefor not Elunes.

Where is Elunes and what have you done with her? :O

8 years ago
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Is it suspicious isn't it? .

We must investigate! ʕ╭ರᴥ•́ʔ

8 years ago
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:(

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8 years ago
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Haha wow.
I lol'ed when I saw what you added. ;)
It looks like it's printed on the shirt.

Clever, clever. XD

8 years ago
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Haha well, I couldn't resist :P

8 years ago
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8 years ago
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With all this logic, I should have summoned two or three of them by now!

8 years ago
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Maybe they were summoned by somebody else first ):

8 years ago
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Story of my life.

8 years ago
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I'm sorry, but by replying to you, im summoning you, aint that cool?

8 years ago
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Besides the gifs, MuIIins doesn't like puzzles... so, a proper summoning would be... gifs+antipuzzles

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8 years ago
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I'll add that!

8 years ago
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So popularity contest + giveaway?

8 years ago
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What does the people mentioned win?

Everyone has access to the giveaway

8 years ago
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Valentine's day is not in my calendar.

8 years ago
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+1 -_-

8 years ago
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I wonder if I can ever summon genkicoll 0.0

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8 years ago
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Who is that? o:

8 years ago
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http://www.steamgifts.com/user/genkicoll

She's very nice and polite

8 years ago
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Well, ask her! ^^

8 years ago
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8 years ago
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why so tsun? :3

8 years ago
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oh, hush ;3

8 years ago
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Play this game and beat her high score.

8 years ago
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So many names I don't recognize!

8 years ago
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What? Wait, what? I don't understand this here thread.

8 years ago
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  1. Be alone
  2. Summon someone by making details given
  3. ???
  4. PROFIT
8 years ago
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By making details given? I do not understand.

8 years ago
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Choose a user, see what to do to summon it and enjoy their company :3

Its mainly a Valentine's joke (:

8 years ago
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Im a teemo!!

8 years ago
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People are so selfish not sacrificing their elbows. :(

8 years ago
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Elbows are overrated anyways ):

8 years ago
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how to summon the rest...???
we want an updated list pls.

8 years ago
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Too many people, need to hire more staff ):

8 years ago
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final call!

8 years ago
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No Swagalicious, no vote.

8 years ago
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you summoned yourself :3

8 years ago
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THIS WAS FUN, SEE YOU ALL NEXT YEAR

I'll add all of these users+ even more people that commented on this thread :3

8 years ago
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Closed 8 years ago by JoaoWho.