Hi SG.
I am curious what you as a user/we as a community think about the following case:

In a discussion within our forums here at SG, user A tells user B to kill himself. User A gets reported for that comment and gets a suspension for it.
How long, do you think, should user A be suspended for that comment? See Poll.

By the way, this is no hypothetical question.
That incident happened four to five months ago. User A got suspended two days for that comment.

6 days ago

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User A tells user B to kill himself. How long should user A be suspended?

View Results
1 day
2 days
3 days
1 week
Several weeks (please specify in comments)
1 month
Several months (please specify in comments)
1 year
Several years (please speciffy in comments)
Permanent suspension
Ban

If A had offered B to send a hitman it would have been one day only as the comment would be more helpful in achieving the expected outcome.

I voted for permanent suspension in the poll which equals one year in SG's interpretation as I still believe there's a slight possibility human character changes.

6 days ago
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A could just be some teenager who used that expression as an insult without actually wishing for B to die. Suspended for a day or two as a slap on the wrist seems fine to me. Then if they're still an ass when they come back mods can consider using the heavy weapons against them.

6 days ago
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I roll with permanent. There's plenty of other ways to voice your discontent that aren't wishing somebody harm or death.

6 days ago
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i was leaning towards perma but thought the person could maybe learn from their idiotic mistake and voted for 1 year

6 days ago
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That's fair.

6 days ago
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personally comments like that are unacceptable in a digital format... in person you can at least tell if they are joking.
so I would go for a year.

6 days ago
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2 days sounds fine for a first time offense of this kind. There is a high likelihood they're a child (or an adult whose mental development has not caught up yet). This particular expression is not that uncommon in that demographic to troll or test boundaries. If it were directed at me, I would blacklist and move on. In the vast majority of cases, they're being obnoxious, not seriously wishing death on someone. If they're a repeat offender, then they're being disruptive, and a longer ban period or a permanent ban is justified.

6 days ago
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It's a website for getting free video game keys. 2 days seems like nothing, as it will hardly have an impact except badly timed when a new bundle drops, for most members. A week, minimum. Maybe a month depending on the context around it for a first offense.

6 days ago
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What's the difference between "Permanent suspension" and "Ban"?

6 days ago
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A "Permanent suspension" can be appealed and lifted. In most cases after one year, in very few cases even before that.
A "Ban" is permanent. There is no way back, except CG personally lifts the ban.

6 days ago
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as a person with depression and suicidal thoughts, its not something to take lighly even if its not seriously meant, my vote is for 1 year at least without warning

6 days ago
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This for sure. If you need someone to talk to don't hesitate to reach out for help. It might be men's mental hearth awareness, but that doesn't exclude women. 🤜🏻🤛🏻

3 days ago
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idk if i need to talk to someone, i dont rly talk to people lol and i do sometimes but never about my issues, unless with therapists etc cuz then i have to .-.

3 days ago*
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I understand. If you do, you can always reach out.

3 days ago
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I'd say, as in real justice, it really depends if this is a first offence or a usual bahaviour.

I'd be happy with one year in a case of usual behaviour.

For a first offence , I'm not too sure, 1 week is small, 1 month is large. Something in the middle maybe

5 days ago
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There is a slur in one thread, when it got posted the guys account said he was suspended for 24 hours. Just had a look and the comment is still up. So he essentially paid 400 points to post a slur. That's assuming that he would have actually have been online during that time. But even if they would have been, it's not like it dented their chances of winning anything. It's probably less effective than if a mod commented "Be nice".

The day or two suspensions should just be more for when someone goofed up a little, maybe bumped a thread a few to many times. But hate speach and telling someone to "kill themselves" isn't a goof.

A week or a month in your scenario is a slap on the wrist.

5 days ago
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I'd vote for a six-month suspension for the several first offenses in grounds that encouraging people to commit suicide is a serious offense and that half-a-year should be sufficient to make them reconsider their attitudes. Only if that person does it for a fourth or fifth time then a permanent suspension would be reasonable.

5 days ago
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There's a difference between people arguing, it escalating, or someone baiting someone into saying something, and it ending at something to be suspended over, and someone that is doing something constantly to troll, bully, denigrate or intimidate others.

So taking it on a case by case basis is fine. If someone continued the same behavior after a suspension, then a much longer suspension, or ban, might be appropriate.

5 days ago
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The number of incidence of that kind of language online is more concerning than one specific occurrence but I still think examples should be made. 6 months seems like enough time to learn a lesson but then I don't know if people using that kind of language in any argument are capable of learning lessons.

5 days ago
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Eh, as far as internet shit-talking goes, that's a very cheap overdone one.
2-3 days (or I guess a week, since people correctly point out that 2-3 days are basically nothing?) if it's a childish outburst;
A month if it's particularly mean-spirited;
Nothing if I'm User B. Me creeping them out by earnestly agreeing with a depression-filled reply about how life is pointless would be its own punishment. :D

5 days ago
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Two weeks to a month because it's a potential trigger with real issues and this isn't a chat room where messages tend to be more impulsive. But it's honestly surprising the user got suspended for it at all, even if just for 2 days. It takes a lot to be suspended for behaviour here, or a mod going personal.

Suspensions are too short and too few for those who actually deserve them in general, and permanent ones are handed after too many repeats. Many don't even notice their few-days suspensions.

5 days ago
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I voted for 1 day, but ideally you need to add an option that in this situation a ban is not needed at all.
In general, I don’t see any point in somehow interfering in such disputes. Give two idiots the opportunity to speak out without fear, at least on the Internet on a non-mainstream platform.

5 days ago
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I’ve noticed you keep talking about 'two idiots' or 'two fools' regarding this discussion. But in the example given, A telling B to kill themselves, it’s pretty clear who’s in the wrong.

Doesn't that fact change your position at all on how to approach this matter?

5 days ago*
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I'm out of context.
What did B say to A to bring him to such an emotional level?
What's the background? Taking it out of context, it is impossible to make a fair conclusion.

5 days ago
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We don't know. Maybe A asked B what kind of music they like, and B responded with Taylor Swift. Who knows. Or maybe A calls it soccer, and B calls it football.

The only fact given by OP is that A told B to KYS, and A got suspended for it. This info tells me that A was being an idiot and B was not, and A should be suspended.

5 days ago
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If I were a judge and I was provided with information in this form, I would send the case for further investigation so that I, as a judge, would be given a complete picture of what happened.

5 days ago
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I would have agreed if the issue was robbing someone from their freedom, which is why court cases take so long. Lots of details, context and what not need to be found and shared with the judge/jury before they can come to a) a guilty verdict, and b) a fitting punishment.

But this really isn't that deep. It's about anon A telling anon B to kill KYS on a public internet forum with set rules and guidelines.

5 days ago
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I already answered your question in the first message.
"In general, I don’t see any point in somehow interfering in such disputes. Give two idiots the opportunity to speak out without fear, at least on the Internet on a non-mainstream platform."

5 days ago
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two idiots

Which is why I asked:

I’ve noticed you keep talking about 'two idiots' or 'two fools' regarding this discussion. But in the example given, A telling B to kill themselves, it’s pretty clear who’s in the wrong. Doesn't that fact change your position at all on how to approach this matter?

And also:

This really isn't that deep. It's about anon A telling anon B to kill KYS on a public internet forum with set rules and guidelines.

So logically, you would either answer OP's question based on the facts as they are presented, or if you refuse to do so due to not having enough 'context' you could edit your original comment from "two idiots" to "I would need more context".

5 days ago
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I formed my answer based on how the question was formulated by the creator of the discussion thread.
If the question had more details, I might have answered differently.
I can’t imagine a situation where one person can wish something so bad to another just like that. I am sure that the conflict had a prehistory and without studying it it will not be possible to fairly assess the conflict.

4 days ago
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Three strikes. Do a short suspension, then a longer suspension, and then a permanent suspension if the user can't seem to get the message after the first two.

5 days ago
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I don't see why there is even a whole subject or arguement needed for it, or punished with a permanent suspension, 95% out of the time those comments are made by people not grown up yet, and many clearly never played an online game where much much worse comments are made and usually go without punishment. And i been a mod in a (100-200? player game, i dunno it's been 20 years ago).

Even this own forum itself was completely different a few years ago (and heavily under moderated) where much much worse has been said and tolerated, apparently even with an admin swearing, in the very first few years (before my time).
This forum has changed, as is the decade we live in, and what we tolerate as a community.

Should we say and take everything? No. But should we perhaps also learn not to be so touchy about every single thing in life that this era has become? It's the same as why political things are against the rules now and we are judging and "trialed" person A while very most likely it could been a 10-14 year old, a newer generation who mostly were raised through their smartphones and social media.
If this has to be compared to the real world, if you say (not do) something bad with your parents around, would you get a warning/slap on the wrist first or a kid gets grounded immediately for a month/year?

We had someone here with clear emotional/depression problems if someone would have said it to her/him in her/his own topic one can argue it could be a trigger. But perhaps B in this case just normally shrugged his shoulders and went on with her/his life.

Seriously if you can't handle certain things, perhaps its better to stay off the internet then, the internet has always been a place with lesser boundaries, but the last years it's basically without boundaries, if a certain group feels like they need to protect each and everyone's feelings, you can't, it's too late and as amanotc says, netiquette has been thrown out of the window a long time ago, and society has changed and is changing. it can be debated on if that's a good thing or not.

5 days ago*
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To add my two cents: I am for a harsh(er) punishment. It is common courtesy to not say those things. And it goes against everything the Netiquette stands for.
Although the Netiquette at this day and age is completely thrown out of the window, I know, I know.

The reason why you never say such things to a complete stranger: You never know who you are talking to. You don't know her or his problems and you don't know if you are triggering something with such a comment. This single comment could be enough to push someone with a severe depression or another form of affective disorder over the edge and gets him to really commit suicide.
There is a good reason that, in some countries, those who write those things are held responsible in court if those comments actually lead to a suicide of another person.

Several arguments within this thread softened my stance a little bit as they rightfully pointed out that user A might have had a temporary brain fart which, as a first offense, should get a less severe punishment if user A is apologetic.

Which stands out to me, tho, is how divided we as a community are in the length of the suspension regarding the poll. I expected a different result, to be honest. Or let me say, I did not expect so much spread.

Edit: Typos.

5 days ago*
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Which stands out to me, tho, is how divided we as a community are in the lenght of the suspension regarding the poll. I expected a different result, to be honest. Or let me say, I did not expect so much spread.

To be fair, you gave a whole array of possibilities, so I think it makes sense for people to think differently on the exact punishment. Should it have said "BAN? Yes/no" I believe you would've gotten a way more uniform answer :P

5 days ago
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Fair points.
I tried to include every option for every opinion, from 1 day to a ban, so I needed that many possible answers :)

5 days ago*
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I'm all favor of having multiple, or even open, options. Just saying that the results then will vary quite a bit.

I'm actually surprised that so many people (half of all voters) managed to settle on 'just' 1 day/week/month.

Out of curiosity, what was your expectation?

5 days ago
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Out of curiosity, what was your expectation?

I had no expectation regarding the suspension length, hence the thread, but I thought that the community would decide on a clear favorite.
I kinda now think that it is very good that the results are so diverse, because it reflects us as a world-wide community and how diverse we ourselves and our cultures are.

5 days ago
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I'm with you. Saying something like that is never ok.
Using this site is a Privilidge, not a right.

4 days ago
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Well, yes.... I definitely remember that Josep Borrell said ‘SteamGifts is a garden and the rest of the web is a jungle.

4 days ago
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I think I recall the incident you're referring to, iirc I didn't understand what User A was saying at first but once I looked it up I admit I was a bit taken aback. I mean don't get me wrong, I'm no saint, I get angry and flustered and sometimes say stupid things and I generally have a distressingly low tolerance for idiots (which I why I work in retail.....) and in the time that I've been here and wandered through the forums I know that things can get heated and borderline hostile.
Still I found that casual throwing of such a comment into what I seem to recall was a rather mild topic a bit disturbing. Regardless of anyone's personal triggers or private experiences, it's still an extreme thing to just throw out into a conversation just for the sake of winning an internet argument. I can only speak for myself that if this had been my little fiefdom, the banhammer would have fallen on that person for quite some time, maybe even permanent. I feel there be should be some self proscribed limit to combative argumentation and engagement, or at the least individuals should have the civilised graces to know when to pretend accordingly. I feel there needs to be a basic level of civility, even in internet gamer land, to make this a place where, perhaps "safe" is too ivory tower, but somewhere where one doesn't have to worry about such extreme posturing. I mean, isn't that what Twitter's for now?
Ultimately though this isn't my sandbox, so I accept that other people set the rules and enforce them and hope that they weigh these decisions accordingly. As we can see already there's a decent spectrum of opinions (as any open-minded society should have), it's probably not something that can be easily solved.

5 days ago
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This comment was deleted 4 days ago.

4 days ago
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The internet is freaking toxic... and I could careless how popular trolling may be. However, in the event that somebody did take their own life because of a cruel comment like that deserves to be banned and more. People should grow the f'ck up and act responsibly when communicating with others because you never know what their state of mind might be.

4 days ago
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I have read that people are missing the possibility of "No suspension" in the poll.

Well, the OP says:
"In a discussion within our forums here at SG, user A tells user B to kill himself. User A gets reported for that comment and gets a suspension for it.
How long, do you think, should user A be suspended for that comment? See Poll."

So the option "No suspension at all" is not a possibility in this scenario. The suspension is a 100% given. This is the premise for the poll.
(Also based on the real life situation this thread is based on, since the user did get a suspension.)

If you just jumped to the poll without reading the opening paragraph... Yeah, you would miss the option "No suspension".

4 days ago
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The correct answer is: "it depends" Of course depends of how WHOLE "discussion" went.

Baning/suspending user for the one comment took out of context is the cancer of nowadays internet

3 days ago
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Is there a way in which telling somebody to kill themselves can be taken out of context?

3 days ago
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Is there a way in which telling somebody to kill themselves can be taken out of context?

There is a dozen ways. It can actually be intended as a joke, it can be a provoked response for the aggresive comments of the other side, etc. and so on. The posibilites are as limitless as limitless is possibility of flow of any conversation

3 days ago
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Telling somebody to kill themselves is intended as a joke, eh. Tell me more about suicide being a joke.

3 days ago
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it can be a provoked response

Rofl.

3 days ago
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I vote for a week. A week is long enough to cool off from whatever sparked the discussion and be noticeable even if you're not a frequent visitor to the site. Two days seems a little short for anyone who's not visiting every day anyway. Repeat offenders should of course get higher penalties.

This is assuming the "kill yourself" remark was casual internet tough speak and not a highly detailed set of instructions tailored to the individual that a lot of malevolent thought was put into. Anything that makes you think of reporting someone to the authorities qualifies for a permanent ban.

3 days ago
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Assuming that OP is referencing the same incident I remember, it was internet tough speak, but the level of escalation was in no way to be expected by the comments before.

3 days ago
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That would make it hit a little harder for the recipient (like someone slapping you out of the blue because you "looked at them wrong") but that wouldn't influence my opinion on the timeout. That is, I wouldn't make it less if the other user had been goading the target, or more because they weren't doing that at all. At worst the other user would also need to be suspended if they had been engaging in tough talk themselves.

Not that I'm actually applying for moderator, mind you. :P

3 days ago
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