I've picked: »My depression/addiction/psychological disorder is/are doing a good job at destroying my life. I might need help (I also might never admit it, or not be able to accept it).«
Beware, unsorted ramblings, which (might) add nothing at all...:
»pretending you never entered this thread«
Nah, not pretending, I hope to forget that I've ever saw this thread.
It popped up during a really bad time, also it just ruined my happiness strike (which was going on for 3 days).
Because I'm veeeery bad at expressing myself, this will unfortunately end short. Just like all my posts on the internet for the last 10 years.
(Fun fact: 10 years ≈ 3650 days. That's more than all my posts together...)
I've depression since early childhood ("since I can think") and it got diagnosed too late. It got really bad sometimes after puberty and it fucked up about everything.
(Couldn't finish school. Couldn't do my apprenticeship. I've completely withdrawn from any social bounds I had. And now I can't make a connection to anyone.)
I was already by two psychologist and both were total shit. One insulted me, the other one alleged me something.
Hmm... That ended shorter than I thought. :/
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Streak not strike, now I know why it felt particular wrong, while writing it. ^^
And don't be sorry. A few hours later I would have happened anyway. Also I got confronted with shit the last couple of days.So, yeah...
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"Lethargically apathetic." Although the reverse might be more true.
Won't fail if you don't try. My past experiences influenced me to fall in with "the wrong crowd" as a youth and I still maintain the habits learned ((almost) nothing worse than dank); my beliefs keep me from getting back on track and working towards "success."
Actually getting into "the real world" recently (i.e. job and hanging with new people), I have discovered that the quiet (what was initially borne from modesty) has grown into a constrictor. I literally "do not know how to person." I've found my rut and doubt anything other'n (")catastrophe(") will move me from it.
And all I'd have to do: (Literally) Get over myself. But I can't.. er don't know how to.. er don't can't feel no.
They say we're starstuff... I got too much of the gravity mixed in (ironic, as 6'8" tall).
Do believe this the longest self-expository post I've made here. Lot more to say (as there always is) - no one (including me) cares.
(Not plying for pity; too cold)
(I stick with the Ed thing because without it, I don't have enough of an identity)(not RP'ing though)
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