Lmao! You even linked articles!
10/10 <3
I wish I had an I am Bread giveaway...
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Well... let me tell you a story...
One glorious day in Bonnie Scotland. The grey clouds were forming (almost like my breakfast), I sat down at the table. Sunny side up, sausages, black pudding... so much more but... No toast. I sit there on the verge of tears, salty just like my attitude and the seasoning on my chop pork...
I head over to my toaster, pop two soft slices of 50/50 bread. I sit down and half enjoy my toastless breakfast. Long minutes pass, I turn sharply and look at that metal chrome toaster and gasp. The camera zooms in a flash and sees it on 9... the highest setting known to human existence. I slide off my chair, down to my knees and I scream so silly that my orange juice glass shattered. The toast jumps up shyly because it knows it's a sorry excuse of cooked bread. I can see the black toast poking up at me, the shade of my heart looking deep into my pure charcolless soul.
I hold my buttered knife and take the smoking bread and stab it multiple times as my tears try to season the mess I have caused.
Mother dearest walks into the hell hole of a kitchen and panics. I tell her "it's ruined." She picks up a piece of the toast with butter bleeding out it's tortures body. "Mmm just like mummy makes it... Mwuahahaha!" She places another piece of bread in the toaster. A hot red 10 carves itself into the dial and the arrow crack towards it. The sliced bread drags down into the firey pit.
Mother dearest strokes Kittens hair and whispers "You are bread."
Camera pans out as Kitten screams "I am Bread"
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It was hard to write it. Too many bad memories. I still smell burnt toast in the air
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I just want to share my awareness to all burnt toast victims
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This might be a wee bit out of place here but, oh how I envy creative people. Sad story but excellently told :)
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Aww thank you! That was a surprising compliment xD it was a very sad moment in my life. I can't go down the bread isle without harassment
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You don't want a comment, that burning a toast is an accident?(Not talking about fire toasts, just about to much toasted toast)
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I didn't burned a toast by myself. I'm just curious that some may toast it to long accidentally. And then they have to taste their own incompetence and feel bad.
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I just knew there would be a rational reason behind my aversion for anything burnt, or even well done. Thank you for raising awareness
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Even though I'm some kind of hardcore feminist I gotta admit this thread is actually pretty funny.
Unlike burned toast. It's never funny to have a toast getting burned.
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Hardcore feminist and sense of humour? You're just messing with people and like to create cognitive dissonance, right? :P
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Most people usually associate feminism with close-minded shrews but actually there are many variants of it (even some who can't stand one another), so it's not incompatible with humour.
But I also like messing with people too.
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Your harassment thread is doing better than mine! I feel harassed ! STOP IT !
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I'm feeling harassed watching a discussion. I need a safe Space.
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So we have this ship that goes to the Space, and will only house 7 people. No outside communication, no triggers, no aggressors through internet or on the streets. The other 6 person will be like a family, working and living together, and in case it would be too much for you, the majority of the time will be spent in cryosleep anyways. I hope that the description won you over, and I'll be able to welcome you as the 7th guest on Nostromo.
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This made me feel like watching a decent Science Fiction movie. Suggestions anyone?
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It's more fiction than science but Source Code was pretty nice. Maybe Sunshine?
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It's times like this that makes one realize how limited NetFlix catalogue really is. Sad times. Source Code does indeed seem like a decent movie. Got to see if I can get a hold of it somewhere. Thank you for the suggestion :)
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ssh don't think about it
think about the fact we voluntarily eat vegemite ^-^
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"a meaty, salty punch in the face."
Sounds pretty good.
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it is actually, dumbass foreigners tend to eat like peanut butter tho. which is dumb. ya spread it on bread over butter thinly, then up the anty as you get more used to it and want some more flavour ᕕ(⌐■_■)ᕗ ♪♬
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I am sorry for burning my toast. I will from now on lecture people about the dangers of burning toast. Thanks for bringing awareness about this serious topic.
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damn toasters ... their the real predators
How burnt toast and roast potatoes became linked to cancer
yeah the pitch black stuff ain't no good
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Burnt toasts are cancer, lawmakers should man up and make them illegal unless the person having them for breakfast filled an appropriate consent form, in triplicate. Health insurance plans should also cover the replacement of any burnt toast by an equivalent or greater native toast - or provide toast-unburning medications.
I'm sorry you had to have that most unacceptable experience, and I hope this thread can raise enough awareness to address that issue once and for all. Toasts have an innate tendency to become burnt, it is out duty, as a society, to help them overcome their problem.
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There are still people burning toast in the world, some people might not understand how serious the problem is because they never had to taste burned toast before! Burning toast is a crime!
With this picture, it is scientifically proven burned toast makes people unhappy. Let me also share some stats to show how serious the issue is:
“researchers estimate that overweight and obesity are behind around 18,000 cases of cancer each year in the UK”
Bump for awareness!
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i burn toasts and i don't give fr*ck
go to h*ck
yea
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