Giveaway Hacker Evolution Duality & Q.U.B.E

Three guys, an Englishman, a Frenchman and an American are out walking along the beach together one day. They come across a lantern and a genie pops out of it. "I will give you each one wish, " says the genie. The American says, "I am a farmer, my dad was a farmer, and my son will also farm. I want the land to be forever fertile in America." With a blink of the genie's eye, 'FOOM' - the land in America was forever made fertile for farming. The Frenchman was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around France, so that no one can come into our precious country." Again, with a blink of the Genie's eye, 'POOF' - there was a huge wall around France. The Englishman asks, "I'm very curious. Please tell me more about this wall. The Genie explains, "Well, it's about 150 feet high, 50 feet thick and nothing can get in or out." The Englishman says, "Fill it up with water

Qube :)

so, 3 guys were on a boat, and a storm starts, the boat crashes on a jungle island, they walk around for hours when 1 shouts LOOK! A PILLAR!
he was right, there was a stone pillar in the jungle, 3 guards ran over and grabbed the men and took them to "the overseer" of the tribe
so the overseer says "go out and get 3 different types of fruit, get 10 of each, now go"
so they go out and get the fruit, one comes back with oranges, the overseer says
"right, now stick all 10 oranges, up your ass, without making ANY facial expression or noise, go"
he gets to the third orange and says" FUCK!"
The overseer says "throw him in the death pit"
he gets thrown into a pit of fire, the second guy comes back with grapes,
the overseer says, "stick all 10 grapes up your ass with no noises or faces"
he gets to the 9th one, then he bursts out laughing
he gets thrown in the pit, then the 2 guys in heaven are talking about it
the 1st guy says, "You were on the ninth one! why did you laugh!?"
the second guy says while laughing," I SEEN THE OTHER GUY HOLDING PINEAPPLES!

If i win, which i probally wont, I want hacker revolution
Thanks bro

http://www.tickld.com/images/2697.jpg

How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman?

NONE!

I'd prefer Q.U.B.E., though I doubt I'm going to win.

Two pies sat in an oven. Then the one said: " Arghh! I'm burning!".
Then the other said: "Arrrghh! A talking pie!".

A newlywed couple moves into their new house. One day the husband comes home from work and his wife says, "Honey, you know, in the upstairs bathroom one of the pipes is leaking, could you fix it?" The husband says, "What do I look like, Mr. Plumber?" A few days go by, and he comes home from work and his wife says, "Honey, the car won't start. I think it needs a new battery. Could you change it for me?" He says: "What do I look like, Mr. Goodwrench?" Another few days go by, and it's raining pretty hard. The wife finds a leak in the roof. She says, "Honey, there's a leak on the roof! Can you please fix it?" He says, "What do I look like, Bob Vila?" The next day the husband comes home, and the roof is fixed. So is the plumbing. So is the car. He asks his wife what happened. "Oh, I had a handyman come in and fix them," she says. "Great! How much is that going to cost me?" he snarls. Wife says: "Nothing. He said he'd do it for free if I either baked him a cake or slept with him." "Uh, well, what kind of cake did you make?" asks the husband. "What do I look like," she says, "Betty Crocker?"

Hope you like it.
I'd like to win Hacker :)

Duke Nukem, Sam "Serious" Stone and Gordon Freeman are going into a bar. Sam speaks to Duke: "I killed 100.000.001 enemies at once today." Duke talks to Sam: "I could do the same, but I can't hold all the weapons anymore" Duke talks to Gordon: "Hey, what about you?"
Gordon: "....... ." Duke: "Man of no words, aren't you?"

Q.U.B.E please

Two nuns were riding their bicycles through the back streets of Rome.
*
One turns to the other and says, "I've never come this way before".

The other nun says, "It's the cobblestones".*

I would like QUBE

A German person walks into a library and asks for a book on war.
The librarian says " NO! You'll lose it !"
(Slightly harsh, but still)
Qube please.
(Hope to god that you're not german)

Two tomatoes walked across the road, then one of them got hit by a car. Then the seconond tomato said "come ketchup lets go"

Hacer evo plz

ok i got 1

10 Husbands, Still a Virgin

A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands.

On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin."

"What?" said the puzzled groom.

"How can that be if you've been married ten times?"

"Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative: he kept telling me how great it was going to be.

Husband #2 was in software services: he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me.

Husband #3 was from field services: he said everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up.

Husband #4 was in telemarketing: even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.

Husband #5 was an engineer: he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.

Husband #6 was from finance and administration: he thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.

Husband #7 was in marketing: although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it.

Husband #8 was a psychologist: all he ever did was talk about it.

Husband #9 was a gynecologist: all he did was look at it.

Husband #10 was a stamp collector: all he ever did was... God! I miss him! But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!"

"Good," said the new husband, "but, why?"

"You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm gonna get screwed!"

id like q.u.b.e if i win

who won! arrgh anticipation!

Qube ftw <.<

Q.U.B.E. would be so awesome. I loved the demo. :)

MÆH

-Insert funny joke here-