I need some advice

Yeah, ok.I'll give you some advice, but I'll need it back.

Confucius says, "Go to bed with itchy bum, wake up with stinky finger."

Never eat raspberries.

Don't build your house out of straw or sticks, but bricks.

When life gives you lemons, don't settle for lemonade, but enjoy the cool and refreshing taste of an ice cold Dr. Pepper. Taste the 23 flavors that Dr. Pepper has to offer.

If you are masturbating while taking a shit , that makes you G@y .
Lifelong advice .

Don't be stupid!

Potato, best advice.

since you are not reading this anyway, here is an advice anyway.

Never drink Licor Beirao. NEVER.

View attached image.

never get involved in a land war in Asia and never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line

Remember to take care of your motorpenis regularly so it'll be well lubricated when traversing dark and moist tunnels with all its llamapower.

Don't forget to wash your balls.

First you get the money, then you get the power, then you get the women.

Try Fernet Branca ;)

Treat people the way you would like to be treated.

If you go to Brazil bring a machete.

Hooooly crap, there is a lot of great advice here. This is going to take me a bit.

just one thing to remender:

.:|:. <xmas-tree

Heres some advice :D if you are in a Isle at the store thats really crowded and you need to get through let one rip and then blame it on someone else in the isle. they at that point get put in a odd state and others will flea in fear of catching wind :P

If in doubt at any moment in your life, pause and ↑↑↓↓←→←→BA

There is just too much good advice here. I would literally have to message every one of you and reward you with my kisses. That's a lot of trouble, so instead I will post all the links here:

poof

For a bit, then move them around.